Jul 4, 2013, 8:40 AM EST
Well, a partial blackout. It happened at midnight when the Kauffman Stadium computers shut down the lights either because they’re programmed to do that or because they have become self-aware and our death at the hands of the machines is imminent.
Well, maybe not so imminent. Murderous, self-aware machines could probably keep the lights off for longer than twelve minutes if they wanted to, but that’s all they could muster last night before John Connor or Emilio Estevez or whoever fixed them.
Those twelve minutes came on top of a two-hour thirty seven minute rain delay. Which means that (a) the game ended late; and (b) the machines would be much better served teaming up with Mother Nature of they’re interested in eradicating the human race. And frankly, Mother Nature has a much greater motive to kill all the humans, so let’s keep our eye on those two, OK?
- The Padres have talked to the Phillies about Cole Hamels 0
- Why is John Smoltz a shoo-in for the Hall of Fame? 16
- Phillies GM told Ryan Howard they’d be better off “not with him but without him” 85
- Trea Turner’s agent is unhappy his client is in limbo after trade to Nationals 48
- Nexen Heroes accept Jung-Ho Kang posting fee from unidentified MLB team 35
- Giants acquire Casey McGehee from the Marlins 16
- The Padres have given their fans something to talk about. Which is badly needed in San Diego. 64
- Justin Upton traded to the Padres for three prospects 79
- Bud Selig will get a $6 million a year pension. Which is obscene. (145)
- The United States will seek to normalize relations with Cuba (144)
- Cubs, Red Sox, Dodgers, Padres, Rangers, and Astros interested in Phillies’ Cole Hamels (112)
- Rays, Padres, Nationals agree to 11-player trade (97)
- Chase Headley signs a four-year deal with the Yankees worth at least $52 million. (95)