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Brian Wilson could audition for teams on August 1

Jul 9, 2013, 3:00 PM EDT

Maybe “throw” or “work out” or “try out” is the better verb, but given Wilson’s historic theatricality, “audition” does seem more appropriate.

 

There’s also a theatricality to his rehab. He’s been out of sight. And now, if he comes back strong and helps someone contender this year, you just know that he’s going to give interviews about how he was in the wilderness and stuff like that. It’s gonna be very “Brian Wilson Returns.”

And I’m kinda OK with that. Not gonna lie: sorta miss that guy.

  1. historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:05 PM

    Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

    • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:03 PM

      The Red Sox are poised to outbid the Tiggers.

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:04 PM

        Good luck with that. I personally invited His Beardedness to come to the D on Twitter.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:05 PM

        Oh well in that case …

      • rocketsteadman - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:21 PM

        Boo, he’s coming to the Cubs when we get rid of Gregg

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:24 PM

        Why would the Cubs get rid of Gregg? Or sign Wilson? That would be like … uhhh … swapping old deck chairs on the Titanic? They have Gregg on a minor league deal, now veteran minimum, you can’t do better than that.

      • rocketsteadman - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:29 PM

        /sighs

        We’re talking about the Cubs here…

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:31 PM

        But now they’re the Theo Cubs. I’m moving a lot of chips on sanity, gorilla-suit notwithstanding.

      • rocketsteadman - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:33 PM

        This is true.
        May we interest you in a slightly used Alfonso Soriano? There are still some miles left on those tires!

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:36 PM

        May I suggest putting Brian Cashman on speed dial – dude is signing the whole waiver wire.

      • rocketsteadman - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:40 PM

        Ty Wiggington was just released!

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:43 PM

        Honest to God, Cashman was my first thought when I read the news on Ty.

  2. Liam - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:14 PM

    I haven’t seen Brian Wilson disappear like this since the initial attempts to record Smile.

    • 1981titan - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:57 PM

      I thought it was Eddie Wilson of Eddie & the Cruisers that disappeared. Eddie, Brian, Brian, Must be somthing with that branch of the Wilson Clan.

  3. timmmah10 - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:22 PM

    It’ll be interesting to see if he goes for a championship or a payday…

    I doubt he’ll have the option for both.

    • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:54 PM

      Um, Tigers?

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:04 PM

        No one’s talking about the AL Central title like it’s some kind of accomplishment. I think timmah means the World Series Championship, which the Red Sox are going to win this year.

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:05 PM

        You just made me spit out my drink.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:06 PM

        /crawls back under bridge smiling

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:07 PM

        Don’t forget to vote Pence!

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:09 PM

        early and often

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:10 PM

        Good man.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 5:57 PM

        I appreciate your willingness to spearhead the charge to get the Red Sox some homefield advantage for the World Series.

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 5:59 PM

        BloSox, please.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 6:00 PM

        I also voted for Koji Uehara while I was putting in the necessary Pence. The world needs more enthusiastic high fives. It just does.

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 6:47 PM

        Hey, I just saw Whitey Bulger on the news in wearing the Red B.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:32 PM

        Speaking of Irish prick psychopaths, one of my grandfathers had business dealings with Joe Kennedy. Said dealings led to such animosity that he actively campaigned against JFK Jr. and ended his local political ambitions at the same time.

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:35 PM

        I’m really enjoying Bulger’s “no snitch” defense. Ridiculous.

        Wow, enemies in high places.

      • unclemosesgreen - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:40 PM

        Let’s just say that I’ve been assured by many a tipsy local official for many years that he was hiding in plain sight the whole time under Federal protection. He was the Southie Pinochet.

  4. 13arod - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:23 PM

    He throw for scouts in the begnning of the year why wait that wrong

  5. kjericho43 - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:23 PM

    With you, Craig. Baseball needs more weird beards. Where are they?

    • ditto65 - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:06 PM

      Maybe if his shtick wasn’t so contrived. I actually appreciate his absence more than his possible BASEBALL contribution.

      • yahmule - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:11 PM

        Contrived is the word, alright. His personality is about as genuine as the meat in those tacos he used to hawk.

  6. Sports King of this world - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:39 PM

    Wow, see how the mighty has fallen off

  7. schm1471 - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:40 PM

    Guaranteed, 5 minutes after he comes back everyone will be ready for him to leave again. “GOT HEEEEEEEEM!”

  8. minimiggy - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:50 PM

    Come on tigers sign him that way we get a potential closer

    • Detroit Michael - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:09 PM

      Among the 36 relief pitchers with 5 or more saves during 2013, Joaquin Benoit has the fourth lowest ERA. I think the Tigers found a potential closer (finally).

  9. deathmonkey41 - Jul 9, 2013 at 3:59 PM

    While initially amusing, I grew tired of him rather quickly- like Jim Carrey, Will Ferrell, and now Zach Galifianakis.

  10. aceshigh11 - Jul 9, 2013 at 4:57 PM

    Brian Wilson = the Carrot Top of MLB

    • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 5:02 PM

      Booo!!!!

      /throws peanuts

      • aceshigh11 - Jul 9, 2013 at 6:10 PM

        Gallagher then?

      • historiophiliac - Jul 9, 2013 at 6:46 PM

        Mmmm, watermelon.

  11. jayquintana - Jul 9, 2013 at 5:47 PM

    Dodgers better be there. I mean, why not? What do they have to lose by taking a look at him?

    • beavertonsteve - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:34 PM

      Don’t the Dodgers have some pretty strict hair guidelines? I think they broke the rules for Manny though, why not let him dye his beard Dodger Blue and keep it?

  12. 11thstreetmafia - Jul 9, 2013 at 7:20 PM

    This guys’ act is old. I wish he would just go where ever Eric Gagne went.

    • 4d3fect - Jul 10, 2013 at 9:47 AM

      You mean Canada?

  13. zigsmart - Jul 10, 2013 at 1:08 AM

    He’s going to fit in well in Boston. His beard and personality along with that ability will look great in a Red Sox uniform!

  14. franklinandbashandflorio - Jul 10, 2013 at 2:33 AM

    Wherever you go Brian, I hope that the spirit of The Machine will always be with you.

  15. bchagnon - Jul 10, 2013 at 7:33 AM

    “…helps someone contender…”

    Drinking early again?

  16. andyreidisfat - Jul 10, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    If he is healthy he would be a nice closer after the phillies trade pap back to Boston. If the phills keep winning then maybe they could sign him as the set up guy since Adams is possibly done for the year

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