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Nick Swisher: “I’m just trying to make the state of Ohio cool again, man.”

Sep 7, 2013, 10:30 PM EDT

nick swisher getty Getty Images

Credit to’s Jordan Bastian for that amazing quote from Indians first baseman Nick Swisher. It’s just the most Nick Swisher quote. Well, maybe if he started off the sentence with “bro”.

To Swisher’s credit, he has had a good couple of days against the Mets. He hit a grand slam yesterday against lefty reliever Tim Byrdak, then swatted a two-run homer in the second inning today against starter Jon Niese. Overall this season, he hasn’t quite been the Swisher we have come to know and accept, as his OPS was down to .733 entering today’s game. But he’s been worth the $11 million they will have paid him over the entirety of the season, the first year of a four-year, $56 million contract signed last December.

The Indians’ 9-4 victory today over the Mets, paired with the Tigers’ 4-3 loss to the Royals, moves them 5.5 games out of first place. Winners of four in a row, Swisher and the Tribe will go for the series sweep tomorrow afternoon.

  1. thomas844 - Sep 7, 2013 at 10:58 PM

    He’s too late, Chapman already made it cool.

    • takemytalentstosoutheuclid - Sep 8, 2013 at 6:46 AM

      Don’t the Reds play in Kentucky?

      • thomas844 - Sep 8, 2013 at 10:57 AM

        Almost. GABP is right near the border and you can see Kentucky from the stadium, but it is still technically in Ohio.

  2. joshfrancis50 - Sep 7, 2013 at 11:17 PM

    One, as an Ohioan, I don’t recall voting for Swisher (a WV native) to carry this banner for us. Two, when was Ohio cool?

    • flpunx - Sep 7, 2013 at 11:27 PM

      Au contraire my friend. I don’t ever recall a time when being from Ohio wasn’t cool. Trust me, I live in Florida. It’s WAY better to be from Ohio. . . .

      • js20011041 - Sep 8, 2013 at 8:35 AM

        While I can’t dispute anything negative said about native Floridians, the state itself is fine. Beautiful weather, beaches, endless numbers of hot women. Hell, even Disney, if you’re into that kind of thing. What exactly does Ohio have going for it? I have a mental list of all the places in the country that I would like to visit, but for the life of me, I can’t imagine a single, solitary reason to ever visit the state of Ohio. Shit, even Iowa has the Field of Dreams.

  3. burm61 - Sep 7, 2013 at 11:51 PM

    For real. Living in Florida sucks. This state needs to disappear.

    • dcarroll73 - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:19 AM

      Don’t worry. Climate change will take care of most of it. According to a list on Wikipedia, the Northern Florida Highlands, the Lake Wales Ridge, and the Brooksville Ridge are the only places over 100 feet so everyone else start looking into houseboats.

      • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2013 at 11:41 AM

        Sorry, all you dweebs in your parkas and moose hide moccasins, we’re still going to be sitting out back with our iced teas and cold beers reading a good book, listening to Irakere on some Latin jazz station and watching our lizards put on territorial displays on the handrails of our gazebos while you clowns are popping one chunk of split oak after another into your potbellies in a futile effort to keep your asses from freezing off without blowing your budget on Syria-jitters inflated heating oil bills.

        Sweetheart, would you please go bring out another pail of ice for my Mai Tais? Thanks….

  4. redwing26 - Sep 8, 2013 at 1:12 AM

    Maybe swish should learn to catch the ball at first instead of trying to be cool. What a waste of a move to pick this clown up!

    • janessa31888 - Sep 8, 2013 at 7:47 AM

      Would you rather have Matt LaPorta back?

  5. flickflint - Sep 8, 2013 at 1:47 AM

    Nick Swisher couldn’t make Fonzie cool

    • ezthinking - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:04 AM

      Well duh. Fonzie is already cool.

      • historiophiliac - Sep 8, 2013 at 11:30 AM


      • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2013 at 11:44 AM

        Fonzie was probably a serial rapist in real life. Punk.

  6. aceshigh11 - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:00 AM

    This guy is such a goofball.

  7. yankeepunk3000 - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:25 AM

    though swish is hitting below what you would normally get his ops is still a good average and OBP is still good. for the 11 mil he is deff. producing for what their paying for. I’m sure next year he can step it up a bit

  8. mc1439 - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:35 AM

    You know what would be cool is; instead of using chalk or whatever for the foul line along third base just use coke instead and between innings for the entertainment see how much you can get running with a giant straw up your nose. Now THAT would be cool.

    • thevauntedchris - Sep 8, 2013 at 4:26 AM

      well okay then

    • stlouis1baseball - Sep 9, 2013 at 10:31 AM

      But wouldn’t that be incredibly dangerous? I mean…imagine if you tripped and that straw went all the way up your nose. And think about how long the straw would need to be to even make this possible. I don’t know mc. I just don’t see how your suggestion is feasible.

      • mc1439 - Sep 9, 2013 at 2:20 PM

        Run backwards?

  9. rcali - Sep 8, 2013 at 4:39 AM

    This guy is a fake everybody. He uses the media to pretend he gives a crap about the local area, but he does not.

  10. drgums - Sep 8, 2013 at 5:17 AM

    the Yankees were idiots to let him go. still rooting for you nick

  11. janessa31888 - Sep 8, 2013 at 7:45 AM

    Despite his offensive struggles, I personally think he IS cool. Its about time this team had someone with personality! ! Plus he was a Buckeye!

    • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2013 at 11:46 AM

      Does anyone make those chocolate peanut butter buckeyes anymore? Haven’t seen one in a dog’s age.

      • historiophiliac - Sep 8, 2013 at 12:32 PM


      • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:32 PM

        Mmmmmmmmm indeed. You know the ones I’m talking about. They look like buckeyes. Big round chocolate balls with a blob of chunky peanut butter in the middle to add crunch. Whoever came up with the idea of combining peanut butter with chocolate was the greatest benefactor of mankind since George Antrobus invented the wheel.

      • stlouis1baseball - Sep 9, 2013 at 10:32 AM

        Yep. I see them at the local markets quite often. Even gas stations.
        They are wonderful with a glass of milk.

  12. brownsguy44138 - Sep 8, 2013 at 8:47 AM

    What is there to see in Ohio? Without even thinking about central or southern Ohio, there is the best roller coasters in the country at Cedar Point, the Rock and Roll HOF, the Pro Football HOF and Put-in-Bay (look it up) and one of the most vibrant theatre districts outside of Broadway. I could keep going, especially when you consider anything outside of the northern 1/3 of the state. Ohio is already pretty cool.

    • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2013 at 2:40 PM

      Jorma Kaukonen’s Fur Peace Ranch. Goetta. Cincinnati chili, especially Fort Washington Chili. Howard the Duck. And speaking of Put-in-Bay, Nerodia sipedon insularum (you could look it up). The Dacron Republican-Democrat. The Licking River nine eyed catfish. One could go on and on….

      • hbdbrowns33 - Sep 8, 2013 at 10:57 PM

        Cedar Point is routinely rated the best amusement park in the world. Every time you go there are license plates from all across the country and Canada.

    • stlouis1baseball - Sep 9, 2013 at 10:34 AM

      I have been waiting for the Cedar Point love. Been their several times. Get a cabin…take the family and a few other friends/family. It’s a blast.

  13. thebadguyswon - Sep 8, 2013 at 10:35 AM

    Swisher pimps just about every home run he hits. But its all cool, bra, cause he always wears a smile.

    He needs a fastball right in his back.

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