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The slowest player in baseball

Sep 25, 2013, 1:48 PM EDT

Billy Butler AP

You know that dream where you are running and running but are not actually getting anywhere. I know people have all sorts of theories about this dream and what it means. Some say it indicates that you have too many things going in your life and can’t quite keep up. Some say it’s the body reacting to being in a sleep state. Some say it doesn’t have any specific meaning at all, but it just an outlet for your brain.

I have come to believe that dream is simply about Kansas City designated hitter Billy Butler.

Billy Butler is slow. Spectacularly slow. It is in his nature. Butler came up when he was 21 years old, a bit of a prodigy when it came to hitting a baseball, and he promptly posted a 108 OPS+. He could hit right away — I predicted from Day 1 that he would win a batting title someday, and I still think he will. But he was spectacularly slow even then, even as a kid. In 2009, he hit .301 with 51 doubles. He was spectacularly slow. The next year he hit .318/.388/.469. He was spectacularly slow. Now, at age 27, he’s an established guy, an All-Star, a lifetime .298 hitter with more than 1,000 career hits an a lifetime 122 OPS+. He remains spectacularly slow.

I have long said that the slowest measurement known to man is a “Molina” and that all players can be measured against it. It’s sort of the opposite of the speed of light — the theory goes that nothing can go faster than the speed of light and so it can be a constant in formulas like the classic E=MC2. Well, I have long believed that nothing on earth moves slower than a Molina — Bengie, specifically, but none of the Molinas are exactly Usain Bolt — and so every player can be measured by Molinas. Jacoby Ellsbury, for instance, is 584,372 Molinas. Meanwhile, someone slow like Paul Konerko is closer to 1.21 Molinas.

One theory about the speed of light is that if anything COULD move faster, it would actually go backward in time. My scientific theory is that anything that moves slower than a Molina would actually stop time or, at least, hit into many double plays.

Billy Butler moves slower than a Molina. It’s part of his enormous charm. There are numbers that show his ultrasonic lead-footedness. He has hit one triple since Sept. 1, 2009. He has hit into more double plays than any player over the last five seasons. He has stolen five bases in his career. Among players with more than 4,000 plate appearances only nine players — among them the legendarily slow Gus Triandos, Cecil Fielder, Dick Stuart, Victor Martinez and, of course, Bengie Molina — have stolen fewer bases.

But more than the statistics, there is the extraordinary joy of watching Billy Butler play baseball. His running is only part of it. Butler is listed at 6-foot-1, 240 pounds and it’s possible that both numbers are exaggerated to the good (more on this in a minute). His uniform pant legs seem about four sizes too big, so that the bottoms bunch up around his shoes and it looks like he is wearing a hand me down from a much older brother. I remember when Billy came up to the big leagues, the other guys on the team gave him a pretty hard time because of his size and age and body type ad speed and because Billy is just a good-hearted lug who commands that sort of ribbing. Anyway, he was taking some pretty decent abuse when someone told him the only comeback he would ever need for such situations.

“Yeah,” Billy was told to say, “but I can hit.”

He can hit, boy. He has a wide stance and perfect balance and his batting swing is absolutely pure. He steps back with his left leg then steps in, utterly in sync, like a dance step, and his eyes lock in on the ball, and his bat rips through the zone, and it’s a thing of beauty. The best word for that swing is gorgeous. Only Robinson Cano has hit more doubles than Butler the last five seasons, and you know Billy ain’t legging any of those out. The man crunches line drives into gaps and smashes shots down the third base line and launches balls off the wall. For him they are doubles. For almost anyone else, some would be triples.

And he runs. You can feel the ground move. There has never really been any question about Butler’s effort. He doesn’t loaf like MannyBManny. He simply moves his legs and his body doesn’t go anywhere. It’s like some kind of magic trick. He will hit a ground ball to short and you will see him start running up the line. Then you will follow the ball to short, follow the throw to first and look back … and Billy’s in the same spot where your eyes left him.

The game has a marvelous history of impossibly slow players. Gus Triandos. Ernie Lombardi. They called Charlie Hickman “Piano Legs” and he was considered an especially slow runner — but he hit 91 triples and stole 72 bases in his career so that doesn’t seem to match up. Boog Powell, however, was famously slow as were other Orioles like Elrod Hendricks and Ken Singleton and Richie Dauer. Baltimore manager Earl Weaver didn’t really care about speed. Incidentally, Dauer does not not get enough credit for his slowness — he had 984 hits, only two were triples, and he was caught 13 of the 19 times he tried to steal a base.

Shanty Hogan was a huge, slow guy famous for eating all the time — it was said once, when ordered by John McGraw to lose weigh, Hogan decided instead to buy a suit way too big for him so that it would LOOK like he lost weight. It didn’t work. Hogan, like Billy Butler, was listed at, 6-foot-1, 240 pounds. I don’t think that’s a coincidence. I think 6-foot-1, 240 pounds is not an actual height and weight, it’s a code for something else. Call it the Da Shanty Code.

Players with 1,000-plus games in big leagues listed at 6-foot-1, 240 pounds:

— Shanty Hogan.

— Billy Butler

— Bob Hamelin

Willie Mays Aikens is one of the most amazing stories in baseball history. When he was born, the doctor named him after Willie Mays … and he actually made it to the big leagues and hit 20-plus homers three times. Think of the odds of that. And then, think of the odds of that someone being named Willie Mays and him probably being the slowest player in baseball. Willie Mays Aikens was like the opposite of Willie Mays Hayes. He was so slow that when he hit a triple in the 1980 World Series, the reaction in the Kansas City dugout was not joy as much as it was insane laughter.

Anyway, it’s a proud role, being the slowest guy in baseball, and I’ve long though that Billy Butler had that all wrapped up. Then, the other day, John Dewan over at Baseball Info Solutions said that in their research they have been timing runners to first base on ground balls that are potential double plays. He has promised to send over some more detailed information, which I will add to the post, but for now here are the five slowest:

1. Welington Castillo, Cubs, 4.84 seconds

2. Billy Butler, Royals, 4.81 seconds

3. Paul Konerko, White Sox, 4.77 seconds

4. Edwin Encarnacion, Blue Jays, 4.67 seconds

(Tie) Yorvit Torrealba, Rockies, 4.67 seconds

Hmm. I’ve got to see the Welington Castillo character run.

Addendum: Great add from BR Blair. He tweeted: “4.84 seconds over 90 feet … linear extrapolation says that’s a 6.45 forty.” Could you imagine looking up any prospect in the NFL and seeing something like, “Strong player and has a great attitude. One drawback is that he runs a 6.5 forty.”

  1. gbrim - Sep 25, 2013 at 1:57 PM

    Miguel Montero is worth a close look. Lots of arm and leg movement, almost no forward motion.

  2. proudlycanadian - Sep 25, 2013 at 1:57 PM

    I refuse to believe than anyone is slower than Benjie Molina.

    • qwerty007qwerty007 - Sep 26, 2013 at 8:04 AM

      And let me introduce you to one Darrin Fletcher, he of the Expos and Blue Jays:

      14 years in the majors, 6 in Mtl, 5 in T.O.

      A grand total of TWO stolen bases (musta been double steals). That’s one every SEVEN years…

      4271 plate appearances….

      …8 triples (almost one every two years).

      That, my friends….is slow.

  3. blimpmaster - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:04 PM

    Jose Molina is the slowest. If he was any slower he’d be in reverse.

    • indaburg - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:57 PM

      Snails look at Jose Molina and whistle, “Damn, is he slow…” Even when Jose Molina moves at full speed, it looks like slo mo, like a speed ramp effect:

  4. philliesblow - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:12 PM

    Albeit due to injury, there is nothing slower right now than Miggy Cabrera.

  5. cubfan531 - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:15 PM

    Dioner Navarro runs at about the speed of a glacier, his time to first has to also be awful.

    • paperlions - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:51 PM

      Indeed. In fact, last night Nate was thrown out “stretching at second” because Navarro only made it that far when starting at first base on a ball hit to the left-center field gap.

  6. dowhatifeellike - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:17 PM

    Linear extrapolation isn’t fair; he’d be at top speed the last 10 yards, so extrapolating with a number that includes him starting in the box doesn’t work. He’s probably closer to 6.1 or 6.2 seconds.

    Still, it begs the question: who was the smallest guy to ever run slower than 6 seconds at the combine? Has that ever happened?

    • dowhatifeellike - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:23 PM

      And to put it in perspective, Rich Eisen has done the 40 each of the past few years in his suit. With no training, and very little preparation, I believe he ran a 6.21 last year. In his suit and fancy shoes.

    • hackerjay - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:37 PM

      Also, I’m guessing that the 4.84 was his home to first time, and not just timing how fast he can run 90 feet. Going from swinging the bat to running is obviously not as quick as getting to start from a line like at the combine.
      My guess is that he could run the 40 in under six seconds.

  7. philliesblow - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:21 PM

    Any of the plow horses noted in the story start at 2nd base, Billy Hamilton starts at home. Would Hamilton circle the bases before any of the slow guys reach home?

    • zzalapski - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:52 PM

      Depends on whether Hamilton is running backwards.

  8. mmason0071 - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:42 PM

    If Jesus Montero ever makes it back to the Majors he could challenge for the title. He looks like he is running underwater.

  9. scoutsaysweitersisabust - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:46 PM

    Sounds like he is clogging the base-paths and should be replaced by faster players hitting for lower averages.

  10. happytwinsfan - Sep 25, 2013 at 2:53 PM

    jim thome in his last couple of years kinda looked like shrek going around the bases

  11. adross47 - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:16 PM

  12. deepstblu - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:33 PM

    I wonder if anybody ever used a stopwatch (or sundial) on Johnny Estrada. As I recall he was rather slow, for a catcher.

  13. wendell7 - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:38 PM

    Butler also has the best nickname in the bigs, which I can’t believe was left out of this post

  14. dowhatifeellike - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:40 PM

    How about the slowest to first at each position? I think JJ Hardy is faster going sideways than straight ahead.

  15. stlouis1baseball - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:52 PM

    Personally, I can’t talk about lack of speed. Well…I can’t make fun of someone for being slow anyway. In my competitive softball league I am often referred to (lovingly of course) as
    “Allis Chalmers” by my teammates.
    I am told when I drive the gap and end up on 2nd it is a thing of beauty.
    And anyone hitting behind me knows to take his time in the box cause’ I am sucking wind.
    I mean…I. AM. SLOW.
    But they never yell “run!” because they know I am running my ass off.
    It just doesn’t look like it.

    Allis Chalmers

    • skids003 - Sep 25, 2013 at 5:16 PM

      You may be slow, but do you get the job done? LOL

      • stlouis1baseball - Sep 26, 2013 at 1:39 PM

        Absolutely! That’s why I am still on the team. I just do it very slowly.

  16. jlovenotjlo - Sep 25, 2013 at 3:55 PM

    Billy Butler is only going to get slower as his career advances. I fully expect that speed to 1st number to advance north of 5 as we approach the 2020 season.

  17. grumpyoleman - Sep 25, 2013 at 4:22 PM

    Pretty sure I was at a day game where vmart hit into four double.plays

  18. psunick - Sep 25, 2013 at 4:24 PM

    Is there any way, Joe, that your articles can be coded on the Android app so we can jump right to them? That’ll save us reading about PEDs and the Minnesota Twins ad nauseam.

  19. dannystancato - Sep 25, 2013 at 4:38 PM

    Slow news day….

  20. saluki66 - Sep 25, 2013 at 4:55 PM

    Did you consider Sherman Lollar of the White Sox?

  21. dowhatifeellike - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:19 PM

    Are pitchers included? How about David Wells?

  22. pdowdy83 - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:28 PM

    My favorite “runner” is Delmon Young. His feet move so much but it’s the tiniest steps and his body goes nowhere. It’s like he is the reverse roadrunner.

  23. moogro - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:42 PM

    Kendrys Morales may not be the slowest, but he always looks like he’s running in a swimming pool.

  24. thebadguyswon - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:44 PM

    My favorite “oversized pants” player is Sabathia. He must wear XXXXL pants – or a 52 waist or something. Those things are ridiculous. Wear a dress if you need them that big.

  25. earpaniac - Sep 25, 2013 at 6:46 PM

    It’s too bad the Royals have been bad for Butler’s whole career. He’s a guy that every year when you look at final stats you say, “how the hell did I miss that?”.

    • eightyraw - Sep 25, 2013 at 8:27 PM

      You missed it because there is nothing too impressive about a bat-only player without much power.

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