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How cute: Manny Ramirez still wants to play

Nov 12, 2013, 7:55 AM EDT

And I want a pony:


I think Japan may be a reach.

Ramirez has had multiple chances to show he has something left in the tank in recent years and he’s shown nothing. Both the A’s and Rangers gave him looks in Triple-A and neither thought he could help them. He had a .697 OPS in 69 plate appearances in Sacramento in 2012 and a .698 OPS in 119 plate appearances for Round Rock in 2013. That’s the sound of a 41 year-old man finding his level. Ramirez knocked the cover off the ball in Taiwan last season. That’s probably also his level.

It’s been real, Manny. But it’s over.

  1. stex52 - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:28 AM

    Yeah, I think I’ll call Kate Upton tonight. See if she wants to dump that Verlander guy and go out with me.

    • NatsLady - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:52 AM

      I think they broke up, so make that call!

      Link is maybe NSFW.

      • stex52 - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:58 AM

        Boy, I am so behind the times. She’ll never go out with such a clueless jerk. Better just stay home.

      • nothanksimdriving123 - Nov 12, 2013 at 2:50 PM

        No stex, she told me last night that she thinks you are totally awesome. In fact, just thinking about you, she could not keep herself from, well, just call her.

    • Old Gator - Nov 12, 2013 at 4:35 PM

      Manny wants to play? That’s not just cute – that’s adawwable!

  2. Jack Marshall - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:41 AM

    When did reality, logic and self-awareness have any influence on Manny’s behavior?

  3. rickdobrydney - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:44 AM

    What a clueless, dumb jerk.

  4. charlutes - Nov 12, 2013 at 8:56 AM

    Honestly Craig, your a joke.

    • phantomspaceman - Nov 12, 2013 at 9:10 AM

      “Sincerely, M. Ramirez”

    • phila1818 - Nov 12, 2013 at 12:21 PM

      “you’re”. Swing and a miss.

  5. hushbrother - Nov 12, 2013 at 9:26 AM

    Not impossible to foresee him as a future hitting coach. Probably not at the major league level, but maybe as a minor league roving guy.

    • Jack Marshall - Nov 12, 2013 at 11:25 AM

      That’s the funniest thing I’ve read in weeks. Months. Ever? It is precisely impossible to see him in ANY capacity involving the supervision of others.

      • bfunk1978 - Nov 12, 2013 at 2:17 PM

        Or one that requires coherent thought, for that matter.

  6. Francisco (FC) - Nov 12, 2013 at 9:27 AM

    And I want a pony

    Now THERE’S an image. Craig Calcaterra, riding a pony into the sunset!

    That expression needs updating. I don’t think it’s anywhere near that hard to actually acquire a pony. A quick internet search reveals Shetland ponies for sale between $500 and $2500 (Only Detroit apartments are cheaper than that). So it’s more likely you can get a pony than Manny breaking into MLB again.

    You know what I want? A McLaren F1.

    • nbjays - Nov 12, 2013 at 10:12 AM

      “Now THERE’S an image. Craig Calcaterra, riding a pony into the sunset!”

      Would he be wearing his trusty Barves bathrobe like the old spaghetti western cowboys wore their duster?

      • Francisco (FC) - Nov 12, 2013 at 10:15 AM

        Oh but of Course!

      • cur68 - Nov 12, 2013 at 6:29 PM

        With the cat in a saddlebag and his sidekick Larry “Kemosabe” Jones at his side.

  7. aceshigh11 - Nov 12, 2013 at 9:28 AM

    To quote Uncle Jun’ from the Sopranos:

    “I want to f$%# Angie Dickinson; let’s see who gets lucky first.”

  8. happytwinsfan - Nov 12, 2013 at 10:16 AM

    he wants to do what he loves to do for as long as he can. you can fault him for other things but not for that.

    • aceshigh11 - Nov 12, 2013 at 11:02 AM

      Something tells me his post-baseball future could be ugly.

      He’s an idiot savant who lives for baseball and nothing else…a lot of his talent is simply natural. His swing and hand-eye coordination are among the best there’s ever been.

      I’m not saying he didn’t work hard, but I really think he had a natural-born talent for hitting a baseball that is very rare, and now that he has nothing else to do…well, he’s already had a domestic disturbance.

      I just hope he can find something to occupy his time because he doesn’t seem to do much outside of baseball.

      • Jack Marshall - Nov 12, 2013 at 11:27 AM

        There’s always Chuck E. Cheese.

      • mydoghasfleez - Nov 12, 2013 at 5:52 PM

        Greeter at Wal-Mart

      • gloccamorra - Nov 12, 2013 at 7:44 PM

        According to baseball reference, he made over $206 million. He can always go shopping.

  9. bdl502 - Nov 12, 2013 at 11:43 AM

    Wow, what a condescending headline.

    • stex52 - Nov 12, 2013 at 12:38 PM

      It is, isn’t it? That’s why I like it.

      • antihypocritz - Nov 12, 2013 at 7:54 PM


  10. metalhead65 - Nov 12, 2013 at 11:49 AM

    hey he just got the latest batch of undetectable steroids and hgh so deserves another he wants to try and catch strawberry for most second chances given behind Steve Howe’s all time record of 27.

  11. NYTolstoy - Nov 12, 2013 at 2:09 PM

    what the hell are you talking about Craig. If you want a pony you can very well afford. Go live your dream and buy that pony! cherish it! I had horses in Mexico growing up and they are man’s best friends. You will love that pony for 20 years and when you shoot it in the face as an old man you will cry one tear ( in Mexico a man is aloud one tear for your mother, soccer team, and horse) all the other tears are reserved for drinking. Now go buy your pony. Name it shawshank and ride off into the freeway

  12. baredon - Nov 12, 2013 at 6:41 PM

    The silly thing about being a sports figure…. They can’t realize when it’s over…. The sad thing about being a sports figure is they try to play when the game has passed them…

    Now your not a idol…. Your a worn out, sad, old idiot…

  13. doctornature - Nov 12, 2013 at 10:36 PM

    In other news, Doctors have apparently discovered a new PED that is undetectable. In other unrelated news, Agents for Bonds, Clemens, Sosa, and many over 50 sluggers have apparently been ‘getting in shape’ and ‘hitting’ to see if they have anything left in the tank.

    • gloccamorra - Nov 13, 2013 at 1:13 AM

      Have Bonds, Clemens or Sosa actually retired yet, or are they still waiting for the right offer?

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