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If you have $5,000 and faith in the Astros, you could be a millionaire

Jan 10, 2014, 9:15 PM EDT

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Nick Mathews of the Houston Chronicle tweets that the Astros have the odds stacked against them to win the World Series in 2014 — 200-to-1 odds, in fact. Saving us from having to do the math ($1,000,000/200), he adds that if you wager $5,000 on the Astros to win it all and they do, you’ll end up a millionaire.

Snicker all you want, but longer odds have paid off in recent history. On September 12, 2011, the Cardinals were 500-to-1 to win the National League pennant, and 999-to-1 to win the World Series. A fan in Las Vegas put $250 on both at the MGM grand. As the Cardinals vanquished the Phillies in five games in the NLDS, cut through the Brewers in six in the NLCS, and toppled the Rangers in seven in the World Series, that fan walked away with $125,000 for the pennant wager and $249,750 on the World Series wager for a total of $374,750.

If you have fifty $100 bills  laying around that you were going to throw in the shredder or use to line the bird cage, why not bet on the Astros instead? You may end up looking like a genius.

  1. tfbuckfutter - Jan 10, 2014 at 9:21 PM

    Anyone that dumb will probably end up dead in some bizarre accident before the season is over.

    • jeffa43 - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:11 PM

      One of the best things ever… 2005, I am in Vegas…. Astros were 15-30.

      Last place. Experts were saying, trade Kent, trade… yada yada yada….

      I said… Oswalt, Clemens, Andy P, and Wandy…… 75 to 1 odds.

      My friends said I was dumb at that point as well….. they said, leave your heart out of it.

      100$….. Framed the receipt…… wish I could have cashed with the same person who sold me the ticket with a smile, and a half hearted good luck.
      GO STROS!

      • tfbuckfutter - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:47 PM

        That’s a good story but I’m not sure where it ranks on the “best things ever” list.

        Somewhere below Penicillin and above Crocs.

      • jeffa43 - Jan 11, 2014 at 1:01 PM

        True.. I guess in my world. The Puholes HR off Lidge, almost game me a heart attack. Stros winning the pennant meant more than the 7.5k.

    • dcfan4life - Jan 11, 2014 at 12:34 AM

      A guy nearly won that betting on the Rays the year they went to the World Series. Am i saying the Astros have any chance, no, im not, im just saying the worst team in baseball has gone to the World Series the following year recently.

  2. chacochicken - Jan 10, 2014 at 9:50 PM

    How much can I win for $2500? Because I’m going to have to spend the other half getting coked up enough to make that bet in the first place.

    • strictlythedanks - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:07 PM

      The lines start here

    • unclemosesgreen - Jan 11, 2014 at 9:32 AM

      The trouble with this bet is that the nuclear holocaust that would make winning this bet possible would also make cashing the ticket impossible.

  3. NYTolstoy - Jan 10, 2014 at 9:50 PM

    Jesus what are some of the other teams odds? I could use 10 grand. I bet 1 dollar. No let’s make it interesting…2 dollars. Life’s about taking chances people who’s with me? No? Anyone? Ok then…

  4. johnnysoda - Jan 10, 2014 at 9:54 PM

    So a guy from Texas dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him by saying “Welcome to hell. The current temperature is 105*F”. The Texan says, “Huh, I like this. It reminds me of home in June”.

    Satan is a little taken aback by this, and says “Alright, how about this, then?” and turns the temperature up to 110*F. The Texan responds, “Where I come from, this kind of weather in July is called a cold front”.

    Satan now gets more annoyed and tells him, “OK, wiseass, let’s see about this!”, and cranks it up even more, to 115*F. The Texan seems to be even happier now, saying “This is even better. Just like Texas in August”.

    Satan is now furious with him, and yells “OK, you like the heat so much, let’s see how you like this!” He then turns the temperature down to 30*F below zero. Hell had frozen over.

    A few moments later, the Texan receives a message from Earth, and a big smile breaks out on his face. Satan says, “Oh, great, what is it now?”

    “The Astros just had a winning season!”

    • tfbuckfutter - Jan 10, 2014 at 9:59 PM

      A teenager with a crush on a girl all throughout high school finally decides to ask her to the prom, to which she agreed. Two weeks before the prom he went to rent a tuxedo. When he got to the Tuxedo store there were already people waiting on the tuxedo line, but he waited anyways. A week before the prom he went to rent a limousine but when he got to the limo office there were people waiting on the limo line, but he waited anyways. On the day of the prom he went to buy a corsage. When he got to the florist there were people waiting on the the corsage line, but he waited anyways.

      During the prom everything was going well, they were dancing and having a good time. The girl whispers into his ear to ask if he can get her some fruit punch. The teenager looks over at the table and there was no punchline.

    • strictlythedanks - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:09 PM

      A priest walks into a day care………..

      you already know the ending.

      • strictlythedanks - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:44 PM

        tough crowd.

      • NYTolstoy - Jan 10, 2014 at 11:43 PM

        Seems rough..I got an old old one…Guy is getting a divorce and in the attic he finds a genie bottle. The genie pops out and says I can grant you 3 wishes but since your getting a divorce your wife gets double what ever you ask for. The man thinks for a while and says I want a mansion. So the genie snaps his fingers and says your wife has two now. The man says I want a million dollars. Genie says ok but now your wife has double that. Then the man thinks and thinks and says for my last wish. ..I WANT YOU TO BEAT ME HALF TO DEATH! Thank you thank I’ll be here all night.

      • km9000 - Jan 11, 2014 at 2:22 AM

        We hope you’ve enjoyed the comedy stylings of Matty Garza.

    • nobodyimportant00 - Jan 11, 2014 at 12:22 AM

      Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result – all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

      Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

      Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.

      Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

      After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.

      Why not?

      Because as far as they know that’s the way it’s always been done around here.

      And that, my friends, is how company policy begins.

      • abaird2012 - Jan 11, 2014 at 10:33 AM

        … and Hall of Fame voting.

  5. km9000 - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:30 PM

    Interesting to look at last year’s odds. Bovada had Boston at 30-1, and StL 20-1. Wash, Det, Tor, LA, LA were the top 5. Sea 200-1. Hou 250-1.

  6. ningenito78 - Jan 10, 2014 at 10:46 PM

    F–k it. I’m in. What’s the number?

  7. blazertop - Jan 10, 2014 at 11:01 PM

    It might as well be a million to one.

  8. DelawarePhilliesFan - Jan 10, 2014 at 11:17 PM

    True – but if you have $5K to piss away on gambling, the better advice:

    • km9000 - Jan 11, 2014 at 2:32 AM

      “And always report your winnings to the IRS… because, it’s… it’s just a good idea, hehe.”

  9. cohnjusack - Jan 10, 2014 at 11:29 PM

    Man…even the 2013 WS loss doesn’t really sting because 2011 happened. That was the craziest, most horrible, stressfully fun 6 weeks of my baseball watching life.

  10. dirtyharry1971 - Jan 10, 2014 at 11:38 PM

    Wanna make even more money? Put down a few bucks on the bluejays for actually winning a playoff series this year!! Too bad its fool’s gold

  11. bobgriffinthe3rd - Jan 11, 2014 at 7:47 AM

    Im BOB GRIFFIN THE 3RD and i approve this message

  12. ytownjoe - Jan 11, 2014 at 11:50 AM

    Do yourself a favor and drop the money in a church basket. Believe me, you’ll feel better about where the money went.

  13. gloccamorra - Jan 11, 2014 at 12:13 PM

    I read the headline. You need not only the cash, but “faith in the Astros”. Improving their defense and filling holes in the line up is nice, but I’d have more faith if they did more this off-season to shore up the worst pitching staff in the majors. When you’re outscored by 1.5 runs per GAME, and gave up 60 more runs than the 29th ranked team, you have a PITCHING problem.

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