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A-Rod offered a job to coach college players

Jan 24, 2014, 11:03 AM EDT

AlexRodriguezAP

It’s a gimmick job offer, of course, and one that Alex Rodriguez is unlikely to accept. But it’s fun anyway:  According to the Torrington Register Citizen, the Torrington Titans of the Futures Collegiate Baseball League have offered A-Rod an assistant coaching position. And he’ll make more money doing that than he will make from any other baseball source this year:

“We can offer him $5,000 for the season,” said Titans General Manager Joey Abis. “The Donut Station has offered him free coffee and donuts for the entire summer.”

I can’t speak for A-Rod, but if I were him they’d have me at the coffee and donuts. Even donuts and coffee offered by the Yankees aren’t free once you figure in the tips to the clubhouse attendants and stuff.

(via Eye on Baseball)

  1. baseballici0us - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:06 AM

    If he accepts….those kids should be privileged to have someone like A-Rod teach them how to inject themselves.

    • fanofevilempire - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:32 AM

      ouch!

      • baseballici0us - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:38 AM

        Clearly it was a bit of sarcasm

      • jiminauburn - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:08 PM

        Not really, he as years of experience. So there would be very little pain or discomfort.

    • asimonetti88 - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:42 AM

      Maybe he can bring them free coffee and donuts and enhance their performance naturally?

      • fanofevilempire - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:52 AM

        oh yeah, well Johnny Gomes said A-Rod sucks.

      • baseballici0us - Jan 24, 2014 at 12:20 PM

        Now I want a doughnut! Do you see what you did!?

      • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:33 PM

        Why do I feel a sudden urge to order a boxed set of Twin Peaks episodes?

    • NatsLady - Jan 24, 2014 at 1:11 PM

      But he couldn’t teach them how to inject

      A-Rod’s scared of needles, remember? Tony Bosch told us so.

      • cackalackyank - Jan 24, 2014 at 2:17 PM

        Nice one.

      • baseballici0us - Jan 28, 2014 at 10:36 AM

        haha!

  2. DelawarePhilliesFan - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:16 AM

    $5000? As Spicoli would say “Mmm, righteous bucks!”

    At least he did better than the Beatles

    http://vimeo.com/19569910

    • rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:22 PM

      I don’t hink so.

      http://www.nbcnews.com/business/money-thats-what-i-want-beatles-still-earning-it-50-2D11988270

  3. yousuxxors - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:30 AM

    I hope he does it

  4. elvin2014 - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:31 AM

    A-Rod is FIGHTING in Federal Court his unjustified suspension at this moment….

    • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:28 PM

      Well, to be a little more accurate, A-Roid is fighting to convince Federal Court to take him seriously. Small moves, babe. Small moves.

    • rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:25 PM

      To be specific, the whining, sniveling little man-child formerly known as A-Rod is throwing a big-time hissy fit by trying to have his very necessary (he broke numerous rules, and did so repeatedly – get those pin-striped glasses off of your face) suspension overturned. He’s nothing more and nothing less than a narcissistic little brat.

  5. elvin2014 - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:32 AM

    Alex Rodriguez could play baseball again with the new york yankees this year. Federal Court could rule in favor of A-Rod to halt suspension….

    • cackalackyank - Jan 24, 2014 at 12:01 PM

      Possible, but not probable.

    • rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:26 PM

      And now for a reality check..

  6. elvin2014 - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:34 AM

    Where are the proofs against A-Rod , Bud Selig?

    • fanofevilempire - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:54 AM

      man are you crazy,

      • fanofevilempire - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:57 AM

        man are you crazy, MLB doesn’t need proof.

        FBI
        CIA
        MLB

    • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:34 PM

      Tacopina, is that you?

  7. elvin2014 - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:36 AM

    Alex Rodriguez could play baseball again with the new york yankees this year. Federal Court could rule in favor of A-Rod to halt his suspension….

    • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:35 PM

      Yes, and Ogopogo could be proven to be a wayward Elasmosaur.

  8. plmathfoto - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:42 AM

    The tainted doughnuts caused me to fail the drug test…

  9. Liam - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:55 AM

    Stop with this nonsense. He is playing third base for my softball team this year.

    • fanofevilempire - Jan 24, 2014 at 11:58 AM

      chicks dig softball.

  10. nymets4ever - Jan 24, 2014 at 12:29 PM

    PEDs or not…he’s Alex friggin Rodriguez. If I’m a college baseball player, I’m hanging on his every word.

    • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:30 PM

      Right. I wanna know how to perform a proper air shot so I don’t wind up with an air bubble stuck in one of my cranial capillaries.

    • rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:30 PM

      Hopefully, that “every word” doesn’t involve instructions on how to cheat. He broke more than one rule, and did so willingly and repeated. If that’s the man you want to emulate, in any manner, your parents did an extremely poor job of raising you. Show the world that you’re better than that, and start by ignoring the words of cheaters. By doing that, you’ll actually give yourself a chance in this life.

  11. jwbiii - Jan 24, 2014 at 12:53 PM

    Actually, Rodriguez got the last $3m of his signing bonus last week, so he’ll make more money than most.

    Can anybody explain the point of giving a signing bonus to a veteran who re-signs with a team? I get it for a draftee (will be paid very little for the next few years) or a free agent who changes teams (will need a down payment for real estate in another city), but Rodriguez certainly had living arrangements in the NY area before he signed his most recent contract.

    • cackalackyank - Jan 24, 2014 at 2:20 PM

      It’s called “We didn’t want the Red Sox to sign him” money. Sorta like the whole effing contract was.

      • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 3:32 PM

        (Guffaw) How badly do you think Cashen wishes he’d let the Beanbags sign him after all?

      • cackalackyank - Jan 24, 2014 at 7:53 PM

        OG I bet he wakes up in the middle of the night screaming “A-rod just go to Boston already Damn-it!”

    • rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:39 PM

      That depends on how the contract is structured, and in some cases, the year in which it’s signed.

      Signing bonuses can serve a number of purposes, and can be paid in a lump sum or can be paid out over the life of the contract. It’s even possible, I suppose, that the signing bonus is deferred until after the player has retired. A contract with such a clause would also likely be setting aside part of the annual value for the same purpose – to provide an income after retirement.

      Of course, the year in which it’s signed is a reference to the way any given player sees the next Presidential election going. At one point when he resigned with the Royals, he arranged for about half of the funds from his new contract to be paid as a signing bonus because he thought that income taxes would skyrocket throughout the life of the contract, and he wanted to hold on to the maximum amount of money that he could. Having it as a signing bonus meant that he paid taxes on that before he thought that the tax rates would change.

      As for a signing bonus for a player who re-ups with his team, consider the possibility that the player was offered more elsewhere, and the signing bonus makes up that difference.

  12. rpearlston - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:20 PM

    And he’s going to teach them what – how to cheat? That’s not exactly a baseball or a life lesson.

  13. dinofrank60 - Jan 24, 2014 at 4:59 PM

    If Mark McGuire can be the hitting coach for the Dodgers, why can’t ARod… forget it.

  14. elvin2014 - Jan 24, 2014 at 6:09 PM

    Question for Bud Selig and MLB:

    Are you afraid that Alex Rodriguez will show THE TRUTH to the world in Federal Court?

    • Old Gator - Jan 24, 2014 at 6:14 PM

      No, I do not believe that A-Roid is going to expose himself in Federal Court.
      - Bud Light

  15. sabatimus - Jan 24, 2014 at 6:32 PM

    I’m glad this is a joke. Having A-rod be a coach for any futures team or league would be irresponsible at best. Unless they want to put out players who try to game the system and are arrogant and think they are above reproach and…oh wait, this should make players ready for MLB just fine.

  16. garybachik - Jan 25, 2014 at 3:33 PM

    That’s just great!! A-Roid the cheater teaching college kids to cheat!!!

  17. dudround2000 - Jan 26, 2014 at 1:05 PM

    ummmm…coffee and dognuts…not so much. How about free ‘roids and a couple of friendly pert breasted co-eds? now we can talk.

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