Jan 29, 2014, 3:30 PM EDT
People paying attention to the Super Bowl when there’s big news like this from baseball:
Source: Descalso, #STLCards settle at midpoint, $1.29M. Deal also includes performance bonuses.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) January 29, 2014
Descalso requested $1.65 million and the Cards offered $930,000.
There. I’ve sunk to a “utility infielder avoids arbitration” post. Are you happy, world? The offseason has officially hit its nadir.
Now: back to working on my action movie script in which Chipper Jones saves America after the evil General Bonesteel tries to kidnap the president. I think I’ll call it “Chipper Jones: Bonesteel.” I don’t have the plot worked out completely yet, but his secret weapon is his Yicketty Stick on which he goes Mammo on his enemies. And when he needs to get out of a tight spot fast, he summons his helicopter by barking “Chopper to Chipper!” into a two-way radio.
I figure it’ll make, like, a billion dollars once you figure in international box office.
- The Winners and Losers at the Trade Deadline 43
- 2015 MLB Trade Deadline Tracker 10
- Report: Yoenis Cespedes heading to the New York Mets 35
- The Blue Jays pick up Ben Revere from the Phillies 62
- Cubs trade for Dan Haren 27
- Cardinals add more bullpen help, get Jonathan Broxton from Brewers 13
- Orioles trade for Brewers outfielder Gerardo Parra 19
- And That Happened: Thursday’s scores and highlights 45
- Blue Jays acquire David Price from the Tigers (112)
- Rangers land ace left-hander Cole Hamels from Phillies (106)
- Royals make another big move, get Ben Zobrist from A’s (95)
- Report: Rockies trade Troy Tulowitzki to Blue Jays for Jose Reyes and prospects (90)
- The Hall of Fame just made a MAJOR change to the Hall of Fame voting process (78)