Jan 29, 2014, 3:30 PM EDT
People paying attention to the Super Bowl when there’s big news like this from baseball:
Source: Descalso, #STLCards settle at midpoint, $1.29M. Deal also includes performance bonuses.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) January 29, 2014
Descalso requested $1.65 million and the Cards offered $930,000.
There. I’ve sunk to a “utility infielder avoids arbitration” post. Are you happy, world? The offseason has officially hit its nadir.
Now: back to working on my action movie script in which Chipper Jones saves America after the evil General Bonesteel tries to kidnap the president. I think I’ll call it “Chipper Jones: Bonesteel.” I don’t have the plot worked out completely yet, but his secret weapon is his Yicketty Stick on which he goes Mammo on his enemies. And when he needs to get out of a tight spot fast, he summons his helicopter by barking “Chopper to Chipper!” into a two-way radio.
I figure it’ll make, like, a billion dollars once you figure in international box office.
- Brewers fire manager Ron Roenicke 34
- Jordan Walden lands on disabled list with biceps injury 11
- Rays place outfielder Desmond Jennings on 15-day disabled list with bursitis in his left knee 1
- Settling the Score: Saturday’s results 34
- Torii Hunter doesn’t care what Floyd Mayweather has done outside of the boxing ring 131
- Yankees GM Brian Cashman acknowledges team won’t pay A-Rod $6 million bonus for 660th home run 69
- Willie Mays congratulates Alex Rodriguez for reaching 660 career home runs 33
- Settling the Score: Friday’s results 38
- Pitchers batting is dumb and the DH should be universal (363)
- Comment of the Day: do not underestimate the seriousness of the anti-DH crowd (201)
- Monday’s White Sox/Orioles game postponed due to ongoing protests and violence in Baltimore (162)
- Torii Hunter doesn’t care what Floyd Mayweather has done outside of the boxing ring (131)
- The Orioles will play to no fans tomorrow; this weekend’s series will move to Tropicana Field (125)