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Wanna buy Roberto Alomar’s house?

Feb 10, 2014, 10:30 AM EDT

Roberto Alomar house

Roberto Alomar now lives in Toronto and is a special assistant with the Blue Jays. Apparently that doesn’t entail going down to Dunedin for spring training, because he’s selling his little Tampa-area pied-a-terre

On the market in the elite Avila enclave of Tampa, FL, is an 18,700-square-foot mansion owned by the retired baseball legend . . . Built in 2001, the ballplayer’s massive estate sits on nearly three-and-a-half acres in the ultra-exclusive community. The home itself, a modern Mediterranean masterpiece, has eight bedrooms, 10 bathrooms, a theater room, a wine cellar and separate staff quarters.

I swear to God, even if you gave me a billion dollars I could never live in a place that huge. I have no idea what anyone does with 18,000+ square feet of space. Even if you had five kids, I don’t know how you use most of those rooms. But I suppose there are a lot of other things I don’t have in common with Roberto Alomar too, so whatever.

  1. kgsmith - Feb 10, 2014 at 10:33 AM

    Aqua SO HOW IS THE ECONOMY THESE DAYS?

  2. asimonetti88 - Feb 10, 2014 at 10:49 AM

    There is a lot of room for activities in that house.

  3. stex52 - Feb 10, 2014 at 10:52 AM

    You buy it because you can, Craig. Then you sit around and try to figure out what to do with it. Then you put it back on the market, try to flip a profit, and find an upscale condo in the city you happen to work in now.

  4. bobwsc - Feb 10, 2014 at 11:22 AM

    that seems like a pretty easy way to make a billion dollars, Craig. and if its too big, you could always create a little spread for yourself within it. think outside the box.

  5. hojo20 - Feb 10, 2014 at 11:29 AM

    Would he spit at me if I asked for $5,000 less than asking price?

  6. nymets4ever - Feb 10, 2014 at 11:30 AM

    Can’t say the thought ever crossed my mind, no. Thanks for asking.

  7. cur'68 - Feb 10, 2014 at 11:36 AM

    That’s not a home one lives in. That’s a place where one can say they live but without ever actually living there. One thing about Larry Jones: anytime you see the interior of his place, it looks like a place he actually lives in. It looks like a place anyone can live in. Alomar’s place, even if it weren’t staged for sale as it is, is without charm. Its much too big, all the surfaces are hard, gleaming, and unforgiving. You can’t imagine yourself having a cup of coffee anywhere in that house. Even if I had the kind of money Alomar is asking for Wretched Excess Manor, I wouldn’t buy it.

    • historiophiliac - Feb 10, 2014 at 2:23 PM

      You could store a lot of seal blubber in that place. He probably keeps a lot beaver there too.

      • cur'68 - Feb 10, 2014 at 2:26 PM

        Well. Yes. I guess. A cold sterile environment would suit the seal blubber, I suppose. But, in general, you need a homey, earth tone sort of place for your beaver. Lots of wood is important. Beavers need wood. That joint would alienate any beaver of worth knowing.

      • historiophiliac - Feb 10, 2014 at 2:31 PM

        It’s a big space. You could fill it with wood, couldn’t you?

      • cur'68 - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:38 PM

        Its not the amount. Its the quality.

      • historiophiliac - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:40 PM

        So, you got bad wood?

      • cur'68 - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:47 PM

        All kinds of wood in this world. Good and bad isn’t up to me. I let the beaver decide on quality. They’re the experts.

      • historiophiliac - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:52 PM

        Well, then you can’t say up front that place isn’t appealing to beaver. Different ones have different tastes. If I were the beaver, I don’t think I’d care for that place, but, you know, some beaver might be easier to please.

      • cur'68 - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM

        Like I said, no beaver worth knowing would like that place.

    • jwbiii - Feb 10, 2014 at 8:39 PM

      The back patio looks ok for a cuppa and a couple of doughnuts.

  8. rbj1 - Feb 10, 2014 at 11:40 AM

    Not interested in anything less than 25,000 square feet. Go big or go, er, not home.

  9. proudlycanadian - Feb 10, 2014 at 12:00 PM

    I know the perfect sucker for it. Come on down Justin Bieber!

  10. moogro - Feb 10, 2014 at 12:42 PM

    Dedicated floor hockey rooms.

  11. APBA Guy - Feb 10, 2014 at 1:06 PM

    My goodness. I spent many years visiting the Pentagon for work. I swear Alomar’s place seems bigger. It’s certainly more shiny. The gloss on the lobbies (think about that, more than one interior lobby) is enough to mandate a tray of loaner Ray-Bans at the front door for unprepared visitors.

  12. js20011041 - Feb 10, 2014 at 1:33 PM

    Meh. If I spent that much money on a home in Florida, it certainly wouldn’t be in Tampa.

  13. louhudson23 - Feb 10, 2014 at 4:39 PM

    Waste.

  14. scoutsaysweitersisabust - Feb 10, 2014 at 7:47 PM

    Warning – Terrible Joke Alert

    They say if you stand on the back deck you could spit on John Hirshbeck’s house.

  15. yousuxxors - Feb 10, 2014 at 8:13 PM

    i would rather have a small house and 100 acres than a giant house and 3 acres

    • stlouis1baseball - Feb 11, 2014 at 1:40 PM

      That makes two of us suxxors. It’s also one of the many reasons I will always live in the Country.

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