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Marlins president David Samson voted off “Survivor” on the reality show’s season premiere

Feb 26, 2014, 9:49 PM EDT

On Wednesday night, CBS aired the first episode of the new “Survivor” season that features Marlins president David Samson. Juan C. Rodriguez of the South Florida Sun-Sentinel watched it so you don’t have to …

“I have no regrets,” Samson said in his parting statement on the island. “The Tribe doesn’t have it together. Or they have it together, against me. … No hard feelings. I consider myself the luckiest person in the world.”

  1. themuddychicken - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:03 PM

    Ugh, spoiler right in the title so it couldn’t be missed. I hadn’t gotten to it yet since I couldn’t see it as it aired.

    • angrytwitterguy - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:34 PM

      If you’re watching this show….

      Damnit you deserve to have it spoiled.

      • themuddychicken - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:10 PM

        meh, everyone enjoys different things. My taste in tv shows is overly eclectic and, frankly, doesn’t make a lick of sense to me, so I gave up trying to understand myself years ago.

      • angrytwitterguy - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:27 PM

        Ya I know, I’m just yanking your chain, people watch much much worse than Survivor.

  2. plmathfoto - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:14 PM

    Sampson: “Damn, now I have to go back to my real job”. “Wait a minute, I can’t get voted off of that job, cool!”

  3. larrytsg - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:16 PM

    Great, he gets voted off a crappy reality TV contest, and cops a line from Lou Gehrig. I mean, at least Lou played with Ruth, won a bunch of World Series rings, and was the struck down in the prime of his life. Samson instead got the axe fast, and then had to sit around off camera on a tropical island for a couple of weeks working on his tan.

  4. themanytoolsofignorance - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:17 PM

    wait. Survivor’s still on TV? Didn’t know that

  5. doctorofsmuganomics - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:26 PM

    People still watch survivor?

  6. chiadam - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:29 PM

    Didn’t Survivor sing Eye of the Tiger?

  7. thehawg - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:31 PM

    I wonder why David Samson has survived so long with the Miamii Marlins.

    • Old Gator - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:43 PM

      Because he’s a happy little whore and bagman who will do Scrooge McLoria’s bidding faithfully. Also because he’s Scrooge’s stepson. By a previous marriage to a woman who can’t stand the sight of him now.

      • proudlycanadian - Feb 27, 2014 at 5:27 AM

        Having him booted off the show is a small mercy.

      • Old Gator - Feb 27, 2014 at 8:08 AM

        For the other survivors, maybe. But we get him back.

    • pastabelly - Feb 27, 2014 at 7:51 AM

      He came off like a total douche. Former Portland star, Cliff Robinson, on the other hand, looks like a class act.

  8. jrob23 - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:36 PM

    thanks for the spoiler a hole. some people live on the west coast db

    • doctorofsmuganomics - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:38 PM

      yes, cry for me, cry. Your tears are delicious.

      I mean, needed for medical research

    • dylanthom2013 - Feb 27, 2014 at 3:08 AM

      LOL you actually watch this fake dogsh_t. Maybe instead of posting in a baseball forum you should help evolution out and slash your wrists you sad piece of trailer-trash fungi.

      • Old Gator - Feb 27, 2014 at 8:13 AM

        Slashing wrists is so Frank Pentangeli. In California, the modern now-a-go-go self-euthanization method is to swallow a newt.

      • arrow43050 - Feb 27, 2014 at 10:44 AM

        Not cool. Who made you arbiter for all things worthwhile? And who are you to tell someone to literally kill himself just for watching a TV show? I think it’s that kind of vituperation and meanness that doesn’t belong in the human gene pool.

  9. butchhuskey - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:48 PM

    Whenever someone praises Bug Selig (*cough, Jayson Stark, *cough), remind that person of how he allowed two total scumbags like Loria and Samson to run a baseball team for so long.

  10. mudhead123 - Feb 26, 2014 at 10:59 PM

    They need to let the little bitch Craig on there. Talk about good tv

    • zzalapski - Feb 27, 2014 at 9:38 AM

      What do you have against Allen Craig? It’s not his fault you passed him up in your fantasy draft last year.

  11. eagles512 - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:25 PM

    Same here muddy

  12. tfbuckfutter - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:30 PM

    Regardless of if he won the competition or not he STILL owes Loria 20% of the $1,000,000 price….and that is gross not net.

    • Old Gator - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:45 PM

      Nobody who lives in Macondo and has followed the lying, cheating, misinforming and general arrogance of the Chihuahua will be surprised that he was one of the first ones no one else on the island could stand. I only wish we could vote him – and his malignant stepdad – out of south Florida as easily.

  13. tomtravis76 - Feb 26, 2014 at 11:52 PM

    Sampson just sucks. Everything about his involvement with Loris owning the Marlins sucks. The are bad for the reputation of baseball in south Florida. The screwed up the opportunity to grow young fans in south Florida by the way the have handled the team and lied to the people. Only hard work and the total removal of loria and Sampson from south Florida and baseball with a new ownership group( here’s looking at you Mr.Cuban) will the Marlins fan base grow.

    • Old Gator - Feb 27, 2014 at 1:15 AM

      Amen.

  14. infieldhit - Feb 27, 2014 at 12:10 AM

    Colleen was a babe.

  15. boukengreen - Feb 27, 2014 at 12:15 AM

    I guess he plans for game seven of the World Series before he plans for game one of the regular season. That is why the Marlins are always out of postseason contention right around the All-Star break

  16. andreweac - Feb 27, 2014 at 12:41 AM

    He couldn’t bamboozle the city of Miami to buy off the contestants with taxpayer $$$. Dude’s game is clearly slipping.

  17. cmtill14 - Feb 27, 2014 at 2:18 AM

    Lasted as long on the show as the Marlins playoff chances will this year. Way to bring it home.

  18. genericcommenter - Feb 27, 2014 at 6:52 AM

    Banged?

  19. karlkolchak - Feb 27, 2014 at 7:33 AM

    Why do I suspet that if the owners played this game Louria would be the first one voted off the MLB island?

  20. thegonz13 - Feb 27, 2014 at 9:08 AM

    Still trying to wrap my head around the fact that a boneheads like David Samson could be voted leader of anything, much less a bunch of alledged “smart people”…

    • gloccamorra - Feb 28, 2014 at 11:23 PM

      I think Garrett put it perfectly: “He’s a leader. He’s also a schemer.”

  21. jediofapathy - Feb 27, 2014 at 10:54 AM

    I figured him out as a moron pretty quick when he complained about his tribemates by saying something like ‘they’re about as good at Survivor as Bugs Bunny is at baseball.’ Bugs Bunny was AWESOME at baseball. I once saw him strike out three guys on one pitch. No wonder the Marlins are terrible.

  22. Old Gator - Feb 27, 2014 at 11:40 AM

    This town would be much better orf if Loria sold the Feesh to Bugs Bunny. Who doubts that the wabbit would run it more effectively?

  23. redsoxfan4life - Feb 27, 2014 at 12:56 PM

    I’ll borrow a line from Barry Swizter to describe Sampson. He’s an arrogant little prick.

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