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Clayton Kershaw and the “New Girl” curse

Mar 3, 2014, 5:41 PM EDT

NLCS - Los Angeles Dodgers v St Louis Cardinals Getty Images

What else could it be?

Clayton Kershaw walked three batters in the third and gave up five runs Monday against the A’s. Sam Fuld and Nick Punto, of all people, did the damage against him. Last week, he allowed three runs and five hits in two innings against the Diamondbacks, so after two spring outings, he’s currently sporting an 18.00 ERA.

All of this comes after Kershaw struck out on the FOX sitcom “New Girl” last month, getting quickly rebuffed after identifying himself and hitting on Zooey Deschanel’s character in the show. Nothing since has worked out right for him.

Kershaw admitted after Monday’s game that he had no explanation for his struggles: “The first two innings it felt like most things were working. In the third inning obviously nothing was working. I don’t know. If I knew, I would have fixed it.”

But we know what’s wrong. It’s obvious. And the curse won’t be lifted until after Kershaw guest stars on an NBC offering, perhaps About A Boy (Tuesday’s 9 pm ET, 8 pm CT).

  1. kingscourt25 - Mar 3, 2014 at 5:45 PM

    It’s March 3rd

  2. missingdiz - Mar 3, 2014 at 5:48 PM

    Maybe he doesn’t want to be Opening Day (in Australia) pitcher this year.

  3. scatterbrian - Mar 3, 2014 at 5:50 PM

    This should dovetail neatly into the “Clayton Kershaw got paid and now he won’t be as good” narrative.

    • apkyletexas - Mar 4, 2014 at 2:42 AM

      Nah.

      He’ll still dominate the Padres in June, and get blasted by the Cards in October. With or without a fat contract.

  4. senioreditor2 - Mar 3, 2014 at 5:59 PM

    He was fine in start #1, he was up a bit in the zone but Crawford butchered a play for 2 of the runs. It’s March 3, I’m pretty confident he’ll be fine once it counts and even if he’s not and average Kershaw is better then 90% of the pitchers in MLB.

  5. thomas844 - Mar 3, 2014 at 6:44 PM

    He should have taken a page out of Albert Pujols’s book and said, “Hi! I train to play baseball and I am good at baseball!”

  6. Bob - Mar 3, 2014 at 7:39 PM

    Is Zooey Deschanel’s 15 minutes almost up? How about a show based on an actual hot chick?

    • yahmule - Mar 3, 2014 at 7:45 PM

      Yeah, that’s never been done before.

    • gmfw7 - Mar 3, 2014 at 10:14 PM

      Besides the fact that she has more talent in her left pinky than you cohld ever dream of, you’re a moron for saying she’s not hot.

      • yahmule - Mar 3, 2014 at 10:26 PM

        She’s another child of show business parents, like more than half of the working actors in the world.

  7. jpalughi823 - Mar 3, 2014 at 8:33 PM

    if the dodgers don’t want him, i’ll take him on the O’s

    • gloccamorra - Mar 4, 2014 at 12:18 AM

      Who will pay his salary?

    • simalex - Mar 4, 2014 at 4:28 PM

      Nah, the O’s would find medical problems with his arm.

  8. yab1sh - Mar 4, 2014 at 9:32 AM

    This isn’t a Scandal and he was completely Justified going on TV. Clayton won’t find himself on The Blacklist anytime soon, and while he may seem LOST at the moment, the season is a long, Amazing Race. He’ll stay in the Homeland, that is, LA, while you Suits and Mad Men write about him. He’ll still be a Person Of Interest when teams face him because he still pitches with the strength of Two And A Half Men while his opponents fall like a House Of Cards. So while we look up to him with Glee like he’s an American Idol, he’ll just keep Dancing With the Stars. Maybe he should give A-Rod a call, I’ve heard his career hasn’t been the same since his appearance on “Cheaters.” Personally I’d love to see him in a Rays uniform Under The Dome, but I have a better chance of seeing Sleepy Hollow on the streets. That all being said, if there’s on thing that’s certain when looking at these guys, it’s that America’s Got Talent.

  9. glennmagas - Mar 4, 2014 at 5:58 PM

    What a great story.

    I want to write for Hardballtalk so I can write about nothing so I have something to write about.

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