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Brace yourselves: kittens playing in an All-Star Game is coming

Mar 14, 2014, 9:34 AM EDT

Screen Shot 2014-03-14 at 9.33.32 AM

If they don’t get Andres Galarraga to throw out the first pitch they had best not even bother. But apart from that, I am behind this 100%:

After winning six million viewers with its Super Bowl Sunday “Kitten Bowl,” Hallmark told advertisers Thursday it is creating a similar event, “Kitten Paw Star Game,” to air opposite baseball’s All-Star game in July 2015.

The MLB-focused event will feature kittens in baseball outfits batting balls — plus celebrities and baseball stars to cheer the kitties on.

I just pray to God that the ratings don’t eclipse the actual All-Star Game or else I’m going to have to go into the “no, baseball isn’t dying” business full time.

I am curious about the 2015 start date for this, though. What’s the holdup? Selecting a host city? Figuring out the fan balloting to select the players? Vast logistical issues which make throwing a bunch of cats into a room with high walls problematic? Inquiring minds want to know.

  1. themanytoolsofignorance - Mar 14, 2014 at 9:42 AM

    Will there be a Puppy Series in October? If so, I’ll watch that. I don’t really care for the All Star Game or a bunch of moggies for that matter

  2. jkcalhoun - Mar 14, 2014 at 9:49 AM

    These events seem to be trending toward ever-less-domesticated species. (Cats are less of a truly domesticated species and more of a voluntary cohabitant.)

    So, what’s next? Coyotes opposite the hockey all-star game? Jackals opposite the NBA?

    Parents opposite the Little League World Series?

    • madhatternalice - Mar 14, 2014 at 1:57 PM

      I want the actual mascots of whomever is in the game to play.

      Actual Seahawks against actual Broncos?

  3. thedoubleentandres - Mar 14, 2014 at 9:56 AM

    Hey, if you can’t wait until 2015 to watch a bunch of pussies play baseball why dontcha jus tune in to a phillies game HIYOOOOOOOO

  4. sdelmonte - Mar 14, 2014 at 9:57 AM

    I hear negotiations with Grumpy Cat to do commentary have broken down.

    • indians131184 - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:31 AM

      the braves have signed him to catch

  5. xdj511 - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:13 AM

    And… we officially have gone a step too far. Having dogs run around a faux football field and then edit it to make it look like there was some semblence of something going on is one thing. Baseball is a much more structured game. There is no way they could put cute puppies and kittens on a faux baseball field and have it make any sense whatsoever.

    • jkcalhoun - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:16 AM

      Fortunately they’ve purposefully scheduled this to air opposite a program that offers a well-structured game, for those so inclined.

      • xdj511 - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:19 AM

        I do apologize. I gave this too much thought. (taking off my tin foil hat) Oh look, fluffy is running the bases!

    • infieldhit - Mar 14, 2014 at 12:26 PM

      They could have puppies and kitties on a faux soccer field, and it would pretty closely resemble the real thing without any editing. Which is probably why I could never really get into it.

  6. jolink653 - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:36 AM

    I hope they drug test those cats. Wouldn’t want any of them getting too much of an edge on the others

    • zzalapski - Mar 14, 2014 at 10:39 AM

      Is catnip a PED?

  7. Old Gator - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:03 AM

    These playful kittens are enough to delight any child’s heart!

    And now, all this natural goodness is captured for you in…Kitten Delight!

    Having a party? Order the family sized bucket of Kitten Delight, regular or extra crispy – and receive a free order of chow mein noodles and a gallon canister of diet soda with your order!

    Remember: don’t cook tonight! Call Kitten Delight!

    • sdelmonte - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:21 AM

      Feh. I prefer Feline McNuggets.

      • jkcalhoun - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:30 AM

        There is no one who actually lives with an indoor cat who would even unintentionally conjure that image.

        My dog agrees with you. That’s why we keep a cover on it.

  8. historiophiliac - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:29 AM

    Are you sh***ing me? Sigh.

    • infieldhit - Mar 14, 2014 at 12:00 PM

      It’s okay, we buried it in litter.

  9. realgone2 - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:29 AM

    I hate cats

    • NatsLady - Mar 14, 2014 at 2:05 PM

      See, this is going to divide the nation.

  10. rbj1 - Mar 14, 2014 at 11:34 AM

    It’s going to take a year just to get all those kittens into uniforms.

    • infieldhit - Mar 14, 2014 at 12:13 PM

      Yep, some of us can speak from experience on that one, hehe! Right, guys? …Guys?

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