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Adam Jones to fans: “You look like a jackass when you run on the field”

Apr 9, 2014, 9:21 AM EDT

Fan on the field AP

Two fans ran out onto the field during the Orioles-Yankees game. Adam Jones was asked about it. His opinions are definitely clear on the matter:

“I think the punishment needs to be a lot harsher and they should let us have a shot to kick them with our metal spikes on because it’s stupid,” Jones began.

“You look like a jackass when you run on the field . . . I get it, you’re drunk and you want to be on SportsCenter. Your [butt] is going to jail with a fine, and you might not be allowed to come back to the ballpark. I remember a couple of years ago, one dude broke his ankle in Baltimore. I was laughing at him. I wish he shattered his femur because it’s stupid. It’s just plain old stupid. Anybody who does it, I wish the cops tase the living [crap] out of them. I wish that.”

He also added that ballplayers don’t go to fans’ offices and run around where they work, so why do they do that at ballparks. Which is a line of reasoning I love wholeheartedly, if for no other reason than the mental image I get of Jones running around drunk through a mail room or factory floor.

  1. unclemosesgreen - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:23 AM

    I agree with the point of this story, which is that ballplayers need to get hammered and go streaking through offices on their days off.

    • asimonetti88 - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:08 AM

      I work very close to Angels Stadium, I fully expect to see Mike Trout here soon.

      • unclemosesgreen - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:50 AM

        If and when that happens you’ll have to let us know whether he’s actually a 6-tool guy.

      • illuminancer - Apr 9, 2014 at 12:58 PM

        You don’t work at a Subway, do you? If so, stay away from the windows/

    • historiophiliac - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:14 AM

      You say that until Chris Perez shows up high at your office and starts shedding clothes in your cubicle while looking for snacks stashed in your desk drawer.

      • r8rnuck - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:36 AM

        hilarious!

      • unclemosesgreen - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:49 AM

        For the last time – his dog is the pothead. Ok?

      • historiophiliac - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:52 AM

        When he came out to pitch last night I was like: man, somebody got into the dog’s weed again cuz he looks like he’s been having lots of munchies.

      • unclemosesgreen - Apr 9, 2014 at 12:00 PM

        His dog likes to cook when he’s high -and he’s high a lot – and most of what he cooks is delicious. Perez is just playing his way back into shape, one inning at a time.

      • yahmule - Apr 9, 2014 at 4:04 PM

        Brody is a good boy!!!

  2. stex52 - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:24 AM

    I appreciate the general sentiment, Adam. Maybe a little harsh. I just tend to wish lightning would hit them as they ran around the field.

  3. aresachaela - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:25 AM

    HAHAHA !! Kick that guys ass for running a mock !

    • Professor Fate - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:12 AM

      A ‘mock” what? Draft? *Amok. Still the wrong adverb for this situation.

      • aresachaela - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:13 AM

        Nah, Just a normal word we use here in our country what it truly means there is idiot.

      • stex52 - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:34 AM

        Yeah we use that word. But you don’t seem to know what it means.

    • renaado - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:19 AM

      Ares… there you go again, why don’t you just admit you press the space bar there and also there is no way the mock word is idiot here in our country.. it’s “tanga”.

      • aresachaela - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:40 AM

        GYAAAA!!!!!! DARN YOU REN !!

  4. buggieowens - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:37 AM

    I got a little chuckle thinking about a drunk Big Papi rampaging through Dan Shaughnessy’s office (which is most likely a bar anyways).

  5. yahmule - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:40 AM

    This reminds me of the time on Seinfeld when Kramer’s friend heckles him on stage and he shows up at her office on Monday and gives her a taste of what it’s like.

    Mike Curtis of the old Baltimore Colts had his own way of dealing with these guys.

    • someguyinva - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:35 AM

      The sound didn’t work for me and my lip-reading skills are non-existent, so I don’t know what Curtis said there. I’ve always heard he said “He broke a community ordinance, and I enforced it” and I so hope that’s true, because it just makes the story better.

    • psuorioles - Apr 9, 2014 at 1:01 PM

      Love me some Seinfeld! Everything we do goes back to that show.

  6. m3dman3 - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:40 AM

    I agree, fans should be limited to cheering in the stands. The wave is an abomination, signs are ridiculous and beach balls, ugh, this isn’t a Jimmy Buffett concert.

    • 18thstreet - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:54 AM

      And get off my lawn!

      • historiophiliac - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:18 AM

        Watching the Aaron historic moment video yesterday, I was highly amused at his family getting to come out and hug him on the field after he touched home.

      • jwbiii - Apr 9, 2014 at 4:21 PM

        I liked the two fans who ran with and patted him on the back.

    • psuorioles - Apr 9, 2014 at 1:02 PM

      You just want to take away all the fun at baseball games… people need to relax a little bit.

      • m3dman3 - Apr 9, 2014 at 2:24 PM

        No, the BASEBALL is the fun at BASEBALL games.

    • psuorioles - Apr 10, 2014 at 2:24 PM

      yes… for guys like you and me the Baseball is the fun part, but for a lot of fans they are looking for a good time and doing the wave or bringing signs and beach balls makes it fun for them…

  7. jbriggs81 - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:41 AM

    I actually have sympathy for the players when a fan runs on the field. Its gotta be a little scary if a fan is running towards you. People are nuts.

    • yahmule - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:51 AM

      Ask Monica Seles.

      • yahmule - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:18 AM

        Sorry I offended the couple of Scheisskopfs who obviously enjoyed seeing a young woman get knifed in the back.

  8. tfbuckfutter - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:41 AM

    You know who else looks like a jackass running around the field?

    Delmon Young.

  9. thetxhammer - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:42 AM

    Best interview of the 2014 season so far.

  10. American of African Descent - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:47 AM

    The exception to this rule occurred one afternoon at Wrigley. There was a rain delay and the tarp was on the field. After about fifteen minutes, a fan ran out and did some slip and slide on the wet tarp. He actually got back into the stands before security caught him.

    To think, though. His antics would not have been necessary had the stadium presented adequate rain delay entertainment.

  11. scoutsaysweitersisabust - Apr 9, 2014 at 9:48 AM

    One of these days a fan will run up to a player and the player will lay them out cold. Personally, I can’t wait. Running onto the field is stupid, dangerous, and in no way entertaining. I too would like to see the penalties increased, although I doubt it will help much. The days of the kissing bandit are long gone. Time to stay in the stands where you belong!

  12. Francisco (FC) - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:01 AM

    Anybody who does it, I wish the cops tase the living [crap] out of them. I wish that.”

    See? And people were criticizing Philly security last year when they tased a Phan. Adam Jones has your back fellas!

    • Liam - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:09 AM

      That was actually in 2010. We are all so old.

      • Francisco (FC) - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:14 AM

        Blistering Barnacles! I could have sworn that was last year! Mea Culpa. Well at least I didn’t say the Earth rotates around the Sun.

      • infieldhit - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:14 PM

        Capt Janeway says hello.

  13. Old Gator - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:06 AM

    I think that any fan who runs onto the field, MLB should send Pablo Sandoval or Adam Dunn to streak their workplace. Let the little jerks go back to work the next day and deal with their colleagues after that.

  14. bigbosscrispy - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:11 AM

    Stupid baseball players and stupid fans…. Can’t wait for this boring sport to burn out forever so the NFL & NBA can assert there dominance and put MLB to eternal sleep. Maybe the MLB should move to Europe, Asia or Mexico and leave the NFL to rule the roost back home. Fans run out onto the field b/c the game is boring! They realize the money they just spent on this garbage and loose there minds!!

    • Professor Fate - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:16 AM

      *Their
      *Lose
      *Their

      Why does your post seem so apropos to a story about a stupid fan?

      • stex52 - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:33 AM

        What, you wanted literacy from a football fan? Get real.

      • renaado - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:36 AM

        Watching NFL is dumb, look what happened to poor Mr.bigbosscrispyasscheeks here.

      • historiophiliac - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:20 AM

        What a looser.

      • nbjays - Apr 9, 2014 at 2:04 PM

        …and stupied, too

    • renaado - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:31 AM

      Truly one of the most idiotic statements I found so far in this site. Look if your not fan of the game get your stupid ass out of here, and seriously, Is Baseball the only sport where some fans runs into the field? No. And just so you know NFL dominance will soon wane in the States every sport has it’s beginning and also has it’s end. I wouldn’t even bother talkin about the NBA.

    • southernballhawk1 - Apr 9, 2014 at 1:41 PM

      The NBA is such a joke. It reminds me of WWE because its so rigged.

    • clemente2 - Apr 9, 2014 at 3:14 PM

      Big Boss Man,
      He just tall that’s just about all

      • jwbiii - Apr 9, 2014 at 4:29 PM

        No, Big Boss Crispy = Fry cook at KFC

  15. Jonny 5 - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:21 AM

    I too fully support the use of tazers on fans running onto the field of play. Not only does it amuse those not doing it, and players, it could make people think twice. You never know when a crazy will do it to injure a player.

    • 18thstreet - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:58 AM

      I believe that a fan ran onto the field in Philly the day after a different fan on tazed. There’s no reason to think injuring streakers (via tazer or players) will deter other steakers. They’re drunk, which means they aren’t thinking about consequences. Which is not to say that I condone streaking. It’s that I don’t think stadiums will ever be able to prevent it.

    • paperlions - Apr 9, 2014 at 1:32 PM

      That is ambitious. I think expecting people to think once is already a high bar to clear….expecting them to think more than that is unrealistic.

  16. apeville - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:41 AM

    The penalties do need to be harsher. I think they should make field crashes play left field for the Astros.

    • Old Gator - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:55 AM

      Oh come on, man. This isn’t North Korea.

  17. dowhatifeellike - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:48 AM

    Give ‘em a helmet and let the guys in the bullpen each take a shot, firing-squad style. That’s a better deterrent than a night in a holding cell.

  18. bigharold - Apr 9, 2014 at 10:51 AM

    Jail is too good for these clowns. Why make them a burden on sociey for getting drunk and acting stupid? Make them really PAY for it.

    I think tazers would be a step in the right direction. Also, huge fines, .. like starting at $5K for a first offense. Perhaps a mandatory stint in rehab at their own expense? A ton of community service to see how much they like picking up garbage on the highways. But, before they are carted off the field they should be hog tied and then “pants-ed”. See how many guys would be willing to run on the field if they know that they’ll end up getting roughed up, mildly electrocuted and dragged off the field feet first with their tighty whity’s around their ankles.

    A little humiliation goes a long way.

    • clemente2 - Apr 9, 2014 at 3:17 PM

      Just shoot ‘em and leave the bodies for the crows and as a warning to others. Piled behind the pitcher’s mound, probably not cause too much of a problem, and the stench would incentivize pitchers to pitch faster, thereby supporting Emperor Selig’s plan for speedier games.

  19. nbjays - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:00 AM

    “You look like a jackass when you run on the field … unless your name is Morganna”

    Fixed it for you, Adam.

  20. mrbiz8505 - Apr 9, 2014 at 11:06 AM

    “Unless they bring BBQ ribs to the outfield….then they’re invited”

  21. classicfinder - Apr 9, 2014 at 12:22 PM

    That would make a awesome Fox Sports One commercial.

  22. chiadam - Apr 9, 2014 at 12:31 PM

    the league that has the least incidents of fans running onto the field gets homefield advantage in the World Series.

  23. jolink653 - Apr 9, 2014 at 2:58 PM

    I agree with Jones on this one. If a fan runs at a player, they should put them down with one swing. I remember when Matt Chatham laid out a streaker who ran onto the field during the Super Bowl. You should get knocked out, automatically tased, dragged off the field and banned from the stadium for life. There’s no excuse for doing what these people do and they should be punished as harshly as possible.

    I also still remember when those two nutjobs went after Tom Gamboa when he was with the Royals and tried to stab him. They have to find some solution for people who run onto the field

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