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Brett Ratner buys the film rights to Yasiel Puig’s life story

Apr 25, 2014, 3:05 PM EDT

Yasiel Puig AP

You all make fun of me for being in the bag for Puig, but when I’m invited to the gala premiere at Grauman’s Chinese Theater or wherever, I’ll have the last laugh:

Brett Ratner has acquired movie rights to the story of Los Angeles Dodger Yasiel Puig’s escape from Cuba. He will produce the project with Beau Flynn . . . Puig, who was the National League Rookie of the Year last season, tried to escape from his home country of Cuba several times and finally succeeded with the help of smugglers working for a Mexican drug cartel who took him to the Yucatan Peninsula. The cartel then held him captive for three weeks after his backer allegedly did not pay enough money.

Ratner is currently working on “Beverly Hills Cop 4,” so you know the man is busy and knows quality entertainment. So this ought to be awesome.

Who plays Plaschke?

  1. scatterbrian - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:25 PM

    This is too bad. Brett Ratner is a hack.

  2. jwbiii - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:27 PM

    Brett Ratner’s grandfather

    http://chronicle.uchicago.edu/031009/red-ratner.jpg

    Plaschke? Murray Chass could use the work.

  3. thomas844 - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:34 PM

    Starring Chadwick Boseman as Puig
    Feat. Kenan Thompson as David Ortiz

    • crispybasil - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:58 PM

      I lol’d

  4. kevinbnyc - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:45 PM

    I’d pay good money to watch Craig portray Plaschke in this movie.

  5. crispybasil - Apr 25, 2014 at 3:59 PM

    Does Jonathan Banks play Plaschke? https://www.google.com/search?q=jonathan+banks&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=iL5aU82jD5WuyASBzID4CA&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ&biw=1280&bih=895

    • scatterbrian - Apr 25, 2014 at 7:11 PM

      That is fantastic.

  6. chiadam - Apr 25, 2014 at 4:29 PM

    But what will the movie be called? I vote for “Disrespecting Baseball: The Yasiel Puig Story”. Or maybe “Running to First is Hard”.

    • apkyletexas - Apr 25, 2014 at 9:02 PM

      “Overthrow: Yasiel Puig and the Lost Art of Reckless Baseball”

    • sportsfan18 - Apr 25, 2014 at 11:11 PM

      Come on folks! Those were funny!

      Lighten and appreciate the humor…

  7. Jeff J. Snider - Apr 25, 2014 at 4:30 PM

    Opening scene: Puig goes back in time and kills Jose Fernandez’s mother just so that Variety’s article announcing the movie will be correct when it says Puig was the Rookie of the Year.

    • koufaxmitzvah - Apr 25, 2014 at 5:15 PM

      Wow. Weekend must be here.

  8. davidpom50 - Apr 25, 2014 at 4:48 PM

    I wonder how much of the royalties Puig has to pay to the Zetas.

  9. jobotjones - Apr 25, 2014 at 4:55 PM

    No matter how many times I see that picture of Puig it makes me smile.

  10. andreboy1 - Apr 25, 2014 at 5:16 PM

    Brett Ratner is awful and on top of that he is a huge D-Bag.

    • scatterbrian - Apr 25, 2014 at 7:19 PM

      He’s also kind of crazypants. I have a friend who works as a therapist. He once told me very vaguely about a client who was working with an insane director on a movie. The only detail I was given was that the director carried a fully cooked steak in his pocket and would pull it out and take a bite from time to time. I immediately said, “Oh, so your client’s working on the new Brett Ratner movie.”

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