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For the last time, don’t touch Adrian Beltre’s head

May 24, 2014, 12:02 PM EDT

It’s well-known by now that Rangers third baseman Adrian Beltre doesn’t like people touching his head for whatever reason. Of course, this just invites people to mess around with him constantly. As you’ll see in the video below, Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera was the latest to do so last night.

It’s an odd and unfortunate phobia, but Beltre’s reactions to these head-rubs will never stop being hilarious.

  1. tfbuckfutter - May 24, 2014 at 12:32 PM

    http://cdn0.sbnation.com/imported_assets/1627015/y5ZHdnB.gif

    • [citation needed] fka COPO - May 24, 2014 at 12:53 PM

      all of these are great

      http://imgur.com/a/kwPzi#8

    • imnotyourbuddyguy - May 24, 2014 at 1:28 PM

      http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/384851/BeltreHead.gif

    • imnotyourbuddyguy - May 24, 2014 at 1:28 PM

      http://media.giphy.com/media/Rqq1tlIF6C2qs/giphy.gif

  2. hoopmatch - May 24, 2014 at 12:34 PM

    He’s obviously a head case.

  3. prospero63 - May 24, 2014 at 1:04 PM

    I’m confused. Are we condoning workplace harassment now? I can never tell with the PC crowd when something is OK or not.

    • tfbuckfutter - May 24, 2014 at 1:50 PM

      When someone isn’t complaining then it’s not a problem.

      Being PC isn’t difficult unless you’re an idiot.

      • metalhead65 - May 24, 2014 at 2:57 PM

        yes it is because you pc people get offended about any and everything. I am surprised you people have not tried to ban the word shortstop since the term short can be considered offensive to the height challenged.

      • tfbuckfutter - May 24, 2014 at 3:06 PM

        Thank you for illustrating my point.

      • jimeejohnson - May 25, 2014 at 1:43 AM

        Surprised you used standard written English, right wing Metalbrain.

    • paperlions - May 24, 2014 at 3:28 PM

      Being “politically correct” is not hard at all if you are respectful of people as individuals. Almost every term deemed politically incorrect is used in an attempt to debase a person based on a generalization related to race, ethnicity, sex, gender, disability, or physical condition.

      If the term is used as an insult, then by definition you are not being respectful. If you find being respectful of people hard, then, yes, being politically correct may be a challenge.

      • tfbuckfutter - May 24, 2014 at 3:50 PM

        I like when people try to explain to the offended party that they shouldn’t be offended.

        If you find yourself doing that, you kind of should just recognize that you’re a dick.

      • jwbiii - May 24, 2014 at 6:21 PM

        Sir, are you suggesting that male sex organs are bad? They can certainly be used inappropriately, as Josh Lueke has done, but they are half of the reason we are here. I feel the same about using names for female sex organs as derogatory terms. Dad had one those, mom had one the other, and then me. I hope they had fun in the process.

      • paperlions - May 24, 2014 at 6:38 PM

        I think of the term “dick” and use it more-or-less to mean someone who just does what he (or she) does without ever thinking…you know, like a dick.

      • tfbuckfutter - May 24, 2014 at 6:28 PM

        I consider the term “dick” when used as a pejorative to mean “overly aggressive when in an agitated state, and always unwelcome when forcefully injected without invitation”.

      • aresachaela - May 24, 2014 at 7:14 PM

        “Euphemism?”

      • jwbiii - May 24, 2014 at 8:25 PM

        Excellent retort, tbuckfutter!

  4. greej1938l - May 24, 2014 at 1:42 PM

    All of those are great guys. Thanks!

  5. zackd2 - May 24, 2014 at 2:32 PM

    Hey HBT, the horse is dead. But please go ahead and keep kicking it every time someone touches Beltre’ s head.

    • doctorofsmuganomics - May 24, 2014 at 3:04 PM

      cry more

  6. gbart22 - May 24, 2014 at 4:34 PM

    I won’t get into the what’s correct and what’s incorrect but technically this would be considered work place harassment no different from say a boss constantly touching his employees shoulders or lower back

    • yahmule - May 24, 2014 at 7:54 PM

      Adrian encourages it by wearing clothes that show off his head. I mean, how’s a red blooded American boy supposed to react?

  7. kappy32 - May 24, 2014 at 6:50 PM

    Really guys? Workplace harassment? Political correctness? Federal law prohibits harassment in the workplace based on race, color, religion, sex (including pregnancy), national origin, age (40 or older), or disability. These laws apply to employers with more than 15 employees (more than 20 for harassment based on age). I’m sorry but touching Adrian Beltre’s head is not workplace harassment. First, Miguel Cabrera doesn’t hold any sort authority over Beltre, nor is he in a position of power over Beltre. If it were Jon Daniels or Ron Washington touching Beltre’s head in a manner covered by one of the categories above, then there would be workplace harassment. However, even that wouldn’t qualify under one of the elements above. At most, such touching could possibly create a hostile workplace. As for political correctness, if you guys think that people aren’t offended by the slightest misinterpreted utterance or action, regardless of the intent, you guys are fooling yourselves. Just because someone toes the line & is respectful & understanding of every person they are associated with in a workplace does not mean an extremely sensitive person with a victim mentality will not overreact to a statement that they interpret incorrectly. Liberal Rights groups such as the ACLU & NAACP have purposely placed people in large companies, corporations, and unions with the intent of that person being subjected to harassment based upon age, race or sex. It could be something as small & irrelevant as a tee-shirt with a partially nude woman on it that sends simple-minded “victims” into an uproar, followed by a lawsuit. As a practicing attorney, I have seen situations such as this & I have deposed the liberal “plants” as part of defending harassment lawsuits. The bottom line is that political correctness is NOT as easy as you people make it out to be. The definition of workplace harassment & hostile work environment are legal terms & definitions. Leave it to the lawyers to define them & don’t make embarrassing assumptions over someone touching another’s head.

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