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Brad Ausmus made a most unfortunate joke

Jun 18, 2014, 5:09 PM EDT

I get it. Your team is in a serious funk and reporters are asking you why you’re not all upset about it. You want to make an over-the-top joke that demonstrates how you’re not overreacting, so you go with the sarcastic overreaction thing.

But really, Brad Ausmus, some thing you just don’t joke about:

Glad to see he immediately apologized. Would be even more glad if this turned into a nice moment in which Ausmus and/or the Tigers did something to help a domestic violence charity or something.

  1. bostonfrogs - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:16 PM

    I miss Jim Leyland.

  2. hojo20 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:16 PM

    Whatever

  3. jeffbbf - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:17 PM

    barf.

    from the M-W dictionary:

    Joke: something not to be taken seriously : a trifling matter

    • scatterbrian - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:36 PM

      Ahh ok. So domestic violence is a trifling matter?

      Bravo.

  4. Reflex - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:17 PM

    I would not want to be Beautiful Brad when Ms Historio reads this story..

    • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:53 PM

      WHAT THE WHAT????

      Oh, no, no, no. First of all — no, very bad not funny joke. Why don’t you ask Miggy how that goes over? Second, no, no BS non-apology “if you were offended” crap. Not beautiful, Brad. Beautiful is as beautiful does. This is ugly. And crappy. And sexist. Boooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • scatterbrian - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:24 PM

        “If what I said offended you, then I apologize.”

        “What I said was offensive, and I apologize.”

        Yeah, I like the second one better…

      • Reflex - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:49 PM

        I like Ausmus, but yeah this was in poor taste. And thank you for the comment, Historio. Violence against women is not funny.

      • indaburg - Jun 18, 2014 at 9:45 PM

        He went to Dartmouth in the ’80s. It sounds about right.

      • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 11:29 PM

        As he has two daughters, perhaps he should reconsider his “jokes” — I hope his wife got a better apology.

      • miguelcairo - Jun 18, 2014 at 10:22 PM

        Ugh. You again. As soon as I saw the comment I thought, “that Philly woman is gonna get her panties all up in a bunch again.”

        Ya dun goofed.

      • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 10:28 PM

        What Philly woman? I guess we all look alike on the internet or something. Run along little piggy. You know where I am, so you know where not to be.

  5. emdash01 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:19 PM

    Over/under on number of comments Mad About How No One Can Take a Joke These Days? At least 4, right?

    • blabidibla - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:30 PM

      3 thumbs down, but only one comment “Mad About How No One Can Take a Joke These Days?” so far.

      Stole their thunder before the storm could even get going.

      • emdash01 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:40 PM

        That’s my style.

  6. mas1012 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:22 PM

    More pissed that he apologized

    • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:13 PM

      Shut up.

  7. eagles512 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:23 PM

    Of course he was kidding but it makes you wonder about someone’s intelligence when they say something so stupid.

  8. sabathiawouldbegoodattheeighthtoo - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:24 PM

    Rookie mistake

  9. sportsdrenched - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:28 PM

    Now, could Jim Leyland pull off that joke?

    • paperlions - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:30 PM

      Eh, he would have just said he smoked more.

      • [citation needed] fka COPO - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:02 PM

        Is that even possible?

      • paperlions - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:12 PM

        Good point….kind of like improving on a OBP of .980…not much room for, um, improvement.

    • moogro - Jun 18, 2014 at 8:16 PM

      No

    • miguelcairo - Jun 19, 2014 at 3:03 AM

      Yes.

  10. paperlions - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:29 PM

    Should have just said, “I sit here and answer the same boring questions from you guys everyday. The patience required to listen to you guys ask dumb questions every single day year after year is much greater than that required to deal with losing a few baseball games.”

  11. jss1330 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:29 PM

    Looks like Brad picked a bad day to quit sniffing glue

    • bostonfrogs - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:32 PM

      I agree–the time for that was 29 games ago.

  12. glenuendo - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:33 PM

    Because simply apologizing is never enough is it?

    • [citation needed] fka COPO - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:40 PM

      When you say “i’m sorry if someone was offended by this dumba$$ thing I said.” That’s not an apology.

      • yahmule - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:54 PM

        Exactly. It was as much – well I have to apologize for this to cover my ass – as it was anything else.

      • [citation needed] fka COPO - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:03 PM

        I don’t understand why it’s so difficult to say “I’m sorry because I said something really really dumb. I apologize and hope to never say it again.”

        Is that difficult?

  13. gigab0t - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:33 PM

    Ya know, I try to look on the bright side but it seems that absolutely no one in the Tigers organization can do anything right these days.

  14. Bar None - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:34 PM

    I love apologies where they say that, “I’m sorry if you were offended” because that makes it sound as though they aren’t sorry they said it, just that you were offended. That is why I try to say, “No offense” before stating anything.

    • scatterbrian - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:28 PM

      Saying “no offense” is just a preemptive “I’m sorry if you were offended”

      • infieldhit - Jun 18, 2014 at 8:25 PM

        “I’m just sayin’”

    • blabidibla - Jun 19, 2014 at 11:53 AM

      Using “no offense” to start a sentence means you are most likely to say something offensive.

    • countertrey44 - Jun 19, 2014 at 1:26 PM

      He apologized for what he was sorry for, “if you were offended”. Sounds good to me. No need to apologize for the joke.

  15. kalinedrive - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:42 PM

    This shows that he takes losing very seriously. Otherwise, he’d just say he kicks the dog.

    • realgone2 - Jun 18, 2014 at 8:40 PM

      oh if he said he kicks his dog. He’d be hung from the highest building in Detroit.

  16. flyinhighwithvick - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:47 PM

    There should be an article about the Phillies sweep of the Braves, in an empty Turner Field. Yea I know, thumbs down.

    • hojo20 - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:07 PM

      I was thinking the same thing. Citi Field attendance, Max Scherzer’s ballooning ERA. I’d like to see posts on.

  17. mikhelb - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:47 PM

    Maybe he was mocking Miguel Cabrera, whom, as we have known, has had a history of hitting his wife or GF

    • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:03 PM

      Which makes it all the more distasteful.

  18. mdpickles - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:49 PM

    I’m upset that Ausmus recycled a Bobby Cox quote. Bobby’s was a little more detailed. After losing back to back extra inning games, a reporter asked Cox how he deals with tough losses like that. He replied, “I go home and beat my wife and kids.”

    • schmedley69 - Jun 18, 2014 at 5:54 PM

      Hopefully Ausmus doesn’t actually follow through with it like Bobby Cox did.

  19. sabathiawouldbegoodattheeighthtoo - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:09 PM

    It is an old joke. It is not terribly funny, but this is basically a matter of ‘things we say in private’ vs. ‘things we say in public.’ In a private situation, I am sure everyone would know that he was being sarcastic and intending to convey that he carries his frustration home. Saying it in public will probably require him to scrub the toilets at Bryn Mawr College as penance.

  20. Shawn S. Lealos - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:10 PM

    Athletes and celebrities shouldn’t joke about anything ever because people will always get offended no matter what the joke is. The celebs should – for their own good – be automated robots delivering answers pre-wrote for them by the PR team.

    • historiophiliac - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:22 PM

      There is a world of difference between talking about abusing your wife — which is appalling and NOT funny — and just saying dumb crap. I hope every woman you know gives you an earful — but you’d probably blow it off anyway. FYI, it isn’t good leadership to pile this on a struggling team. There is nothing to be proud of here.

    • [citation needed] fka COPO - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:12 PM

      Athletes and celebrities shouldn’t joke about anything ever because people will always get offended no matter what the joke is.

      Spitballing here, but assuming the joke is “When Person A is annoyed, they do Action B to repressed Group C”, right? That’s the basis of the joke we’re dealing with. So let’s change it up.

      NYPost Reporter: Joe [Girardi], after today’s loss, how do you deal with it?
      Girardi: Well, I go home and lynch my neighbor Tom.

      Is anyone laughing here? If he says he shoots his gardener Jose, is that funny? Or what about whips his Asian nanny? Is that funny?

      So why is it funny when he’s talking about domestic violence against a group of people [women] that have to suffer real abuse at the hands of their husbands?

      • tablescrappy - Jun 19, 2014 at 3:09 PM

        You make an amazing point. Unfortunately you use Logic to make it, which is usually incompatible with people to whom Empathy and Nuance are complete f**king mysteries.

  21. prospero63 - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:13 PM

    It would seem the sand is causing chaffing.

  22. chrisrsports - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:13 PM

    I don’t like that he apologizes “IF” he offended anyone. That bothers me more than his original comment (as long as it was just a bad, off-the-cuff joke as it appears to be).

    Why do people often use the phrase “if I offended anyone” when they apologize after making insensitive remarks?

    It sounds like the offender is saying that nobody should have been offended, but just in case anyone out there is an oversensitive cry baby, here is an insincere apology.

    Just say you are sorry to “everyone that was offended”, that would certainly sound more sincere.

  23. johnnysoda - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:26 PM

    “I apologize for that if it offended anyone”

    That’s not apologizing for saying it, that’s apologizing for having to own up to it.

    • tfbuckfutter - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:42 PM

      I actually think it depends on the timing.

      If you make that joke and immediately realize it was stupid and offer that apology because you aren’t sure how it’ll be received, I think it’s ok. It’s better than just saying nothing and hoping no one picks up on it. You’re at least acknowledging on your own that it probably could across as offensive which wasn’t your intent.

      If you apologize after people start voicing their offense, then yeah, you’re not taking responsibility for your action you’re apologizing for people’s reaction.

  24. kiwicricket - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:35 PM

    Curious as to what the reaction would be if say, Ozzie Guillen said something like this?

    • indaburg - Jun 18, 2014 at 9:49 PM

      Ozzie being Ozzie.

  25. tfbuckfutter - Jun 18, 2014 at 6:39 PM

    The thing about a joke is that if it makes one person laugh really hard, sometimes it’s worth it.

    And Matt Garza literally pissed his pants laughing at this joke.

    • scatterbrian - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:34 PM

      Or it points out that one person is a complete a$$hole.

      • tfbuckfutter - Jun 18, 2014 at 7:46 PM

        Technically it’d be two people.

      • scatterbrian - Jun 18, 2014 at 8:36 PM

        Haha, you’re right!

    • infieldhit - Jun 18, 2014 at 9:35 PM

      Meanwhile, Eminem saw the quote and said “Hey, that’d be a great idea for a song!”

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