Skip to content

Derek Jeter: part owner of a company that sells high-tech men’s underwear that refrigerates your genitals

Jul 11, 2014, 8:43 AM EDT

Derek Jeter Reuters

Derek Jeter‘s business interests aren’t limited to children’s books. He’s also into underwear referred to as “Tempur-Pedic banana hammocks.” From Page Six, of course:

Move over, Victoria, Derek Jeter has an even bigger “secret.”

The Yankee slugger’s retirement plan includes becoming an underwear mogul, Page Six has learned.

The slugger is a secret owner of Frigo RevolutionWear — a customized men’s underwear brand that sells skivvies more colloquially known as “Tempur-Pedic banana hammocks.” The high-tech undies sell for $100 a pair and include a “soft lock adjustment system” plus a “patented pouch” dubbed the “Frigo Zone.” (We’ll leave the zone’s location to your imagination.)

The guy who runs the company has said that the product “separates your genitals from the rest of your body . . . It lifts a little bit so [guys] feel the comfort.”

$100 for that? Hasn’t anyone ever heard of Gold Bond?

And while I know it’s a cliche to note this every single time this kind of thing comes up, I really do wonder how this would be received if A-Rod was an investor.

  1. baberuthslegs - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:01 AM

    Yikes, I don’t want my genitals separated from the rest of my body.

    • nbjays - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:43 AM

      So you’re not married, then…

      • baberuthslegs - Jul 11, 2014 at 11:41 AM

        Awesome reply!

      • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 11:56 AM

        Man, Sam Kinison would have a field day with this.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 1:27 PM

      You know who else could use this?

      Dwyane Wade.

      Because his nads just hit the floor, with LBJ going to Cleveland, Bosh about to go to Houston, and Wade crying over about $10M a year his opt-out just left on the floor.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 1:41 PM

      There’s also a good marketing slogan that shouldn’t be going to waste here.

      (Picture Dennis Haysbert voiceover)

      “Your ba*** are in good hands with the Cap’n.”

  2. karlkolchak - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:02 AM

    $100 for a pair of friggin’ underwear? I got suits that cost less than that. Don’t give up the day job, Derek, oh wait…

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:27 AM

      This will be in his second kids’ book:

      “I’ve got junk in my trunk
      And that ain’t no bunk
      But my junk stays cool
      Because that’s my rule.
      Kids, treat your junk with pride
      And let it take you for a ride.”

      • zzalapski - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:56 AM

        Yeah, but can he do that in iambic pentameter?

      • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:08 AM

        I think he’s probably just at the Seuss level.

  3. drewzducks - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:06 AM

    So even the great Jeter can have blue balls.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:55 AM

      And chicken ones, if he’s afraid of modeling himself.

  4. philliesblow - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:28 AM

    Obvious that Costanza doesn’t work for the Yankees anymore, he’d be telling Jeter about the evils of shrinkage.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:47 AM

      “The Contraction,” another chapter in his secret new book.

  5. pisano - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:40 AM

    Somethings are better left unsaid.

  6. nbjays - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:45 AM

    I wonder if you can dial them cold enough to have an anaesthetic effect… you know… for those pesky HBPiD moments.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:52 AM

      Or if your Viagra goes past the four-hour deadline?

    • indaburg - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:26 AM

      Another practical application, besides HBPiD, is possibly keeping the swimmers healthy. Does it keep the testicular region cool and separated from the body?

      • tmc602014 - Jul 11, 2014 at 4:36 PM

        yes

  7. yankeesfanlen - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:47 AM

    Didn’t know men liked frigidity that much.

  8. jimmyt - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:51 AM

    One of the more humorous posts I’ve seen on DerekJeterTalk.com.

  9. rollinghighwayblues - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:55 AM

  10. SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:56 AM

    I also like this part of the description:

    The product’s marketing materials further explain: “Unlike other garments that keep things in place by compressing your package inward, Frigo provides support from behind so you won’t feel constricted.” All right, then!

    “Support from behind”? Is Jeter “batting from both sides”? Wearing … er, some sort of plugs?

  11. billnightmare - Jul 11, 2014 at 9:59 AM

    “This underwear is very, very complicated.”

    http://m.vice.com/read/24-hours-in-derek-jeters-underwear-0000234-v21n2

  12. aresachaela - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:01 AM

    OMG… Is it weird for a girl reading this? NVM

    Still looking good Derek XD!!

    • renaado - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:05 AM

      Was it okay readin for you though? Even my eyes twitched seein that…

      • aresachaela - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:10 AM

        No!! LOL XD!!

      • sophiethegreatdane - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:16 AM

        I have to ask: who is this XD you’re always talking to?

      • renaado - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:21 AM

        Haha, told you to always put one space for the exclamation point before putting your XD’s, Achaela.

      • sophiethegreatdane - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:40 AM

        Hmmm….nevermind. I see now. You’re trying to do this –> XD but you keep typing “XD!!”

        Maybe leave the exclamation points off that so it works?

      • renaado - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:57 AM

        Lol Sophie, Achaela knows that already, she’s just bein funny.

        I’ll just leave her at that if I were you ;-)

  13. realgone2 - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:18 AM

    I bet they have one you can freeze and use.

  14. indaburg - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:20 AM

    This seems somewhat beneath Jeter’s carefully cultured image. “Frigo” sounds like a snack you buy from a NYC food vendor. “These fried frigos are fantastic! You have to try them.”

    • historiophiliac - Jul 11, 2014 at 11:40 AM

      Similarly, am I the only one who thinks Magnum ice cream is sorely misnamed and reminds me of condoms whenever I see an ad?

      • genericcommenter - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:55 PM

        You mean like when Rachel Bilson stops her car in traffic and has to climb over cars to lust after some big ice cream bar to shove in her mouth, while the narration says “nothing will keep you from getting a Magnum”?

  15. SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:48 AM

    Will this be a Yankee giveaway to fans at the final homestand of the year?

  16. paperlions - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:55 AM

    In the future will they have a Jeter bobble heads giveaway?

  17. fifthstarter - Jul 11, 2014 at 1:08 PM

    Cooling underwear seems really unpleasant tbh.

  18. tfbuckfutter - Jul 11, 2014 at 1:15 PM

    Umm….this actually sounds more like a miracle-bra to make your package look bigger by lifting and enhancing your junk.

    I’ve heard about them before because a couple years ago some celebrity made embarrassing news by being caught purchasing them.

    • SocraticGadfly - Jul 11, 2014 at 1:18 PM

      And, if you’re roiding, it might help support your Whizzinator at pee test time!

  19. genericcommenter - Jul 11, 2014 at 10:52 PM

    I buy boxer briefs that do that for about 15-18 bucks. Personally, I find it a lot more comfortable when there’s a pouch that keeps things from being sat on, stuck behind the legs while walking, smushed and mashed, etc. One problem is, a lot of “pouches” are inexplicably small- I don’t want underwear that is compression shorts and also compresses the junk.

  20. 4cornersfan - Jul 12, 2014 at 4:49 PM

    Investing in businesses like this is why you see old baseball players homeless on the streets.

Leave Comment

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Not a member? Register now!

Featured video

Patience finally paying off for Royals fans
Top 10 MLB Player Searches
  1. R. Castillo (2837)
  2. D. Ortiz (1993)
  3. M. Trout (1969)
  4. A. Pagan (1963)
  5. A. Pujols (1912)
  1. J. Hamilton (1866)
  2. N. Arenado (1802)
  3. G. Stanton (1779)
  4. H. Ramirez (1766)
  5. C. Kershaw (1709)